Today, my boyfriend figured out that he can bounce small things off of my boobs, and has been doing it every time I look away. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend started talking to my breasts in public. As if that wasn't bad enough, he then started to jiggle them in his hands. FML
Today, I noticed that I've been gaining some weight. Don't worry, my boyfriend doesn't mind. His new favorite thing is putting my boobs on his head and saying he feels "safe". FML
Today, ever since I let my boyfriend touch my boobs, he thinks it's appropriate to grope me whenever he feels like it. Even talking to him about it doesn't seem to stop him. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in bed, when suddenly, he turned to me and started playing with my breasts as if they were turn tables and he was the DJ. FML
Today, my boyfriend saw my boobs for the first time. His reaction was, "Well that's... disappointing". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on. My boyfriend noticed that every time I'm about to climax, I hit my head on something. Whether it's a wall or his face. FML
Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted to subtly encouraging me to do stupid things because he finds my "bimbo moments" hilarious. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML
Today, I woke up with bruised nipples because apparently my boyfriend likes to excessively play with them while I sleep. FML
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Top comments
nublets 12
Boobs can make men stupid, i think its in our DNA or something. And maybe see if you can bounce things off his junk and see how excited he is about it? :p
zojieeu 6
Just treat it as a compliment that you have bouncy boobs
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Comments (143)
hellbilly205 17
It could be worse, alteast he's not abusing you, or completely ignoring you...
psych10 4
Who gives a shit
maosquare 18
Well, apparently you do enough to warrant a post here.
hellbilly205 17
And i would imagine OP cares as well if she posted it.
starman02 12
And I think I do since I commented
psych10 4
That's worthy of an FML comment? Really? Mundane shit can be posted on here?
psych10 4
Ok I have one as good as this. Today, I was doing my homework and it was not fun, FML
hellbilly205 17
I knew what he was doing i was being a smart ass...
starman02 12
Has he figured out he can hide stuff in them yet?
coried91 28
I figured after I posted my comment. I saw your other comments and said damn it. I had already posted so I couldn't undo it.
Kog_Hiro 17
People do that with my afro. Except they don't wait till I'm looking away.
Mikey070590 5
Well what do you expect
Kog_Hiro 17
I expect Morgan Freeman to start narrating my life along with Samuel L. Muthafuckin Jackson... Sadly it never happens. :'(
mrphychrs 5
show us your ****
marisadc79 0
Well if my boyfriend was doing that he'd be finding a new girlfriend. Um hello, maturity. Sounds like he needs a life. Keep your arms wrapped around your chest that'll piss him off.
Kog_Hiro 17
Immaturity is a great thing in moderation 60. Breaking up with someone for that... Kinda shallow. Just sayin.
patrickalamo 48
You have not found out that when you kick him between his legs he droops to the floor.