Today, my boyfriend and I were wondering whose extra spare key was on the counter when we came home. Turns out it's his ex's and she returned it, while neither of us were home. We're still taking inventory to see what's missing. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was back home from work drinking coffee when I heard someone open the door with a key. It was my boyfriend, who obviously didn't expect to see me home. We don't live together, and I never gave him a key. FML
Surprise, MFer!
Today, my girlfriend and I broke up. When I got home from work, I came home to glitter. EVERYWHERE. Guess who forgot to get the key to his apartment back from his ex-girlfriend. The guy who's having his family over for dinner tonight. FML
Today, my boyfriend came round to drop off some underwear, which I'd left at his house. Not all of what he brought was mine. FML
Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML
Who do you take me for?
Today, I was staying over at my boyfriend's house, sleeping in his sister's room while she is away at college. I left my necklace on her dresser. When I came back, it was gone. His mother saw it there and thought it was her daughter's necklace. She hid it so I wouldn't "steal it". FML
Today, my girlfriend's mother came over for a few hours. After she left I went to grab a drink, only to find that three bottles of expensive liquor were missing from our liquor cabinet. FML
Locked out
Today, my girlfriend left for basic training. I went to say goodbye to her at the airport. Only after I walked back to my car did I realize that she still had the keys. My extra set was back at the house, locked in. FML
Smoking gun
Today, my roommate asked me for help finding her wallet because it’s been lost for days. I helped a bit, but it never turned up. I left to go to my boyfriend’s house as I'd planned. Guess whose wallet I found laying on the ground next to his night-stand? And why it was there… FML
Today, I changed the locks on my apartment so my crazy ex girlfriend couldn't get in. I went to her house to return her house key. I accidentally gave her the key to my new locks, and can't find her old house key. Now I need her to come let me in to my own house. FML
Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML
Top comments
giantsfan2010 23
She probably shouldn't have had those keys in the first place...
rieebee 23
Creepy way of returning the key, but she would have to be really stupid to take anything, considering you know she was the one who was there.
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Comments (88)
LittleChestnut_fml 8
This is why I always change my locks when someone moves out. I don't care how much I trust the person.
NotARealThing 4
I know this is a strange suggestion but, maybe nothing is missing. Perhaps, unlike the majority of the idiot population, his ex just stopped by, let herself in, put the keys on the counter where they would be safe and locked the door on the way out. Strange concept in this day and age, but maybe she was just being honest and responsible.
TheLadyOpal 30
I think the OP and her boyfriend have a pretty good understanding of his ex. If they knew her as an honest and responsible sort, they wouldn't be worried about her stealing from them.
areyourachel 5
OP here! I did ask him why she still had they key, he said that he forgot she had one. I'm really confused as to how you forget someone has a key to the house...
kozy88 1
should have changed the locks.
Um_Awkward_ 12
I think you should be worrying more about why she has a spare key...
DoubleDosexo 12
was the door locked when you got home?
jeanyrios 10
CHANGE THE LOCKS
worldclassrager 41
Well at least you have it back right? Unless she made copies to keep trolling you two Change the lock if necessary
uptightpansy 8
If I was the ex, I would have broke in every day while they were out to add things. the conversations would have been hilarious. "When did we get a second salt shaker?" "Who bought cheap hot dogs?" "why do we have so many extra hangers in the closet?" "who left these pubic hairs in the toilet?"
mikimouse_fml 10
Haha ! Too funny ! But I might be more tempted to leave some sexy panties (ones he wouldn't recognize as my own) or maybe a condom packet (a different brand than he uses) conveniently left only slightly hidden. Maybe a small earring somewhere (again one he wouldn't recognize as mine). Etc ... LMAO
swaggyswagswag 17
Or maybe she was mature and didn't take anything... If she hasn't done anything in the time since you broke up why would she suddenly come back and do something..