Work: Today, my boss was being a total asshole. While in the bathroom,...

By fired - 23/11/2010 13:41 - United States

Today, my boss was being a total asshole. While in the bathroom, he turned his back on me, so I gave him the finger, mouthed obscenities, and pantomimed stabbing him with a knife. He was looking in the mirror and saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 223

You deserved it 65 486

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/12/2016 15:06 - United States

Today, I was on my way to work and someone cut me off. I then switched lanes and sped past the person as I flipped them off. What I didn't notice was that the person that cut me off was my boss. He's been shooting me dirty looks from across the room all morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 990

You deserved it 5 780

Kill me now

By bademployee - 12/08/2014 23:16 - United States - Portland

Today, my boss had a lengthy and obnoxiously egocentric conversation with a colleague. After she left across the office, I stood up, looked over at my colleague, and made a sarcastic "shooting myself in the head" gesture. I saw my boss staring at me over a cubicle wall as I turned around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 882

You deserved it 21 664

Got something for you

By Anonymous - 01/05/2013 21:48 - United States

Today, my co-worker and I played a game where we give each other the bird in whatever creative manner we could come up with. Deciding to be sneaky, I hid behind a wall with my middle finger up as I heard him walking into the office. It was my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 169

You deserved it 40 889

By TJ AJ RJ / IV the V - 21/11/2014 06:11 - United States - San Diego

Today, my boss flipped me off in traffic on my way to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 781

You deserved it 4 112

By robert - 31/01/2012 00:20 - United States

Today, I went to deliver some reports to my boss in his office. He was facing away from me and ranting about his "useless employees", so I slipped in and waited for him to put the phone down. Turns out he was talking to himself. When he noticed me, he bitched me out and threatened to fire me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 458

You deserved it 4 215

Weird guy

By thinkimquitting - 25/06/2012 21:49 - Australia - Yarraville

Today, my boss grabbed my arm, raised it above my head, closed my other hand into a fist, and pushed it into his armpit. After staring at me for several seconds, he winked and left without saying a word. This isn't the weirdest thing he's done, and I'm actually starting to fear for my safety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 232

You deserved it 2 577

By Anonymous - 16/10/2015 13:31 - United States

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 322

You deserved it 1 817

By jeed(1) - 25/08/2013 21:36 - France - Marseille

Today, at work, I stepped out for a few minutes to use the bathroom. Shortly after returning, I found out the hard way that one of my coworkers had used my computer to send a profanity-filled email to our boss, calling him an asshole and telling him to go fuck himself. I'm now jobless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 647

You deserved it 5 290

Shut up!

By Anonymous - 03/03/2013 18:03 - Germany - Augsburg

Today, I was awkwardly taking a dump at work, when a coworker in another stall started talking shit to me about our boss. I grunted and agreed, hoping he'd shut up and leave me alone. That's when a third guy sarcastically chimed in with insults from a third stall. It was our boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 968

You deserved it 11 217

By 911 - 13/11/2008 03:57 - France

Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 230

You deserved it 2 323

AkeemKN 1

Tuesday 23 November 2010 18:59

kill him.

WeirdUp 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 19:06

looked in the mirror LIKE A BOSS!!!!!

Comments

perdix 29

Tuesday 23 November 2010 19:41

Who would think they'd put mirrors in bathrooms? Oh . . . With your level of intelligence, I don't think you will be hard to replace.

theFMLiest1ofThe 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 19:43

you should have told him that you and your imaginary friend, Steve, got into a heated argument over the way your boss has been treating you lately and when Steve threatened to kill your boss you felt you had no recourse but to kill Steve first. yeah...THAT'S less embarrassing

heyheywaddup 7

Tuesday 23 November 2010 19:54

u get fired??

30STMluvva 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 19:54

BAHAHA... YDI!!!

jabba_bear27 5

Tuesday 23 November 2010 20:07

like really dude? were you new to the bathroom? cuz most bathrooms I've seen have mirrors....juuuust sayin.

Stixx55 2

Tuesday 23 November 2010 20:10

way a dick

Fallout3widow 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 20:13

Did you die?

Illyriel 0

Wednesday 24 November 2010 8:03

If he did, he's obviously got some sort of amazing system set up to post his FML after the fact. Oh... You weren't being literal. I see how it is.

june1903 7

Tuesday 23 November 2010 20:40

All I can say is...you're a dumbass.

Peasanthunter_fml 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 20:44

You are a dumbass. That is all.

macskapingvin 0

Tuesday 23 November 2010 20:46

"Today, one of my employees was being a total asshole. While in the bathroom, I turned my back on him, and he gave me the finger, mouthed obscenities, and pantomimed stabbing me with a knife. I was looking in the mirror and saw everything. I'm just doing my job and even my employees abuse me. FML"