Today, my bike got stolen because I left my keys in the lock. On my way home, I saw my bike in front of a store, unlocked. I jumped on it, only to get punched in the face by the guy that had taken it, and got it stolen from me again. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I came home from work to find the lock to my bike busted and my bike stolen. The worst part was a nicer bike was sitting right next to it without a lock. FML
Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML
Today, I decided to bike to work. I normally forget the key to my lock, so I leave it out back and hope that nobody takes it, and nobody does. I finally remembered my lock key so I chained it up. After my 7 hour shift, I walk to the back only to find the lock had been cut, and my bike was gone. FML
Today, I biked to the store to buy a new lock, since biking is my only form of transportation. I left my bike unattended for the last time, only to come back with a new chain, but no bike. FML
Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen, so I went to work. On my walk to work, a girl pulls up on my bike and says I needed to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. She hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass before police surrounded me and accused me of stealing my own bike. FML
Today, my motorcycle was stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, the thief drove past me. Twice. FML
Today, I saw a bike locked to a short bollard, making it very easy to steal. Being as nice as I am, I stayed, hoping the owner would come soon and no one else would take it. Then the guy who bullied me in highschool showed up, asked me what I was doing, laughed at me, took the bike, and left. FML
Today, I went to retrieve my stolen wallet from a train station. After I collected it, I returned to the place where I'd parked my bike, only to find that my bike had been stolen. FML
Today, my bike was stolen. Partially. Since I always locked it up, some asswipe thought it would be funny to steal the handlebar stem and the seat, leaving the actual handlebar dangling by the brake cables. Since there was no way to steer or sit, I had to carry my bike one mile back to my dorm. FML
Today, after a long workout I come back to my locker, to find my lock had been cut. I looked inside realizing my phone and iPod had been stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, my keys were gone. I ran out to the parking lot to find an empty spot where my car had once been parked. FML
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Top comments
kellanlvr 1
Grand Theft Auto: Bike Edition
moop256 10
well you have to rip off the bicycle seat and see to it he is anally raped by the pole while he makes his get away ;)
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Comments (262)
wordnerd42 0
That's when you look and see another identical bike sitting across the street, and you go jump on that one. They're all yours!
wordnerd42 0
^'Twas sarcasm, by the way. OP shouldn't assume any bike that looks like theirs belongs to them.
LaughterofCorn 4
You should've taken the pedals and seat off. I'd like to see him ride away like that.
NomOnShroomz 14
Yea cause he had time to do that.
KatrinaKitten 16
Finders, keepers... Losers, weepers...
Guitarist76 0
right xD
KatrinaKitten 16
I guess people just can't handle the truth xD Thumb downs here I go again ...
koe4 0
...on my owwn! going down the only rooad ive ever knoown!
KatrinaKitten 16
That's another song I'll never know..I suppose. Thanks though. *dramatic tear*
wrigglezeus 0
like to see someone try that in a court of law as an excuse for theft.
flyerfan101 9
chase him down
alpaquette91 9
you shouldn't take things that aren't yours finders keepers after all...
goshpeople 4
So it was okay for the other guy to steal his bike because of the "finders, keepers" rule, but he can't take a bike even though it was similarly left unattended? Not even taking into consideration the fact that the bike may have been his own, that sounds ridiculous.
alicedbt 0
yeah but maybe the keys shouldnt have been left in the lock..
RabidBunny 10
You know, this is why I walk everywhere! There isn't anything to worry about than.
McGherkin 0
Only mugging.
amberlysue 3
yeah. walk so you can get mugged. intelligent
j_cat187 19
cut that kid
nlr 9
quit being a girl and be a man! go after him and punch him in the face and take your damn bike back!
KatrinaKitten 16
Easier said than done.
anie01 5
I'm a girl, and when when my bike was stolen and I found the guy riding it, I TOOK IT FROM HIM. He even called me a bike thief-- like that made him look SO much cooler after a girl a foot shorter than him took his bike out from under him. Maybe this guy needs to be a little bit MORE like a girl.
anie01 5
I'm a girl, and when when my bike was stolen and I found the guy riding it, I TOOK IT FROM HIM. He even called me a bike thief-- like that made him look SO much cooler after a girl a foot shorter than him took his bike out from under him. Maybe this guy needs to be a little bit MORE like a girl.
SeedlessMe 13
Hells yeah, Anie!- we need more awesome chickies like you! =) "I'm a girl, but I sure don't hit like one." ;)
philitron128 0
or he can stop being a bitch and get his shit together, Jesus Christ today's society is a bunch of lame duchebags
AliJayne19 0
says the one who is doing an "airplane" in the picture...
a_nutritionist 10
your first mistake was saying 'todays society' as though previous generations were prone to be muscle bound superheroes. your second was to assume theres something wrong with being taken by surprise and being knocked off your bike. your third was breathing. i think we both know which one of these you can make right. get on that.
nlr 9
why does it matter if I'm doing an airplane?! it has NOTHING to do with the fml or comments! dumbass
soccertc12 0
Open up a can of whoop-ass and when you get your bike back run over him!
fmlmaster241 0
ummmm u firkin punch him back!!! don't let him ride away on ur bike!!!!!!