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This doesn't seem like a huge issue, unless the breakup was awful and/or very recent. I don't see why your friend isn't allowed to be friends with an ex of yours... Of course if those were her intentions.

Kinda violates the bro-code, never date a bros ex. Not sure about the female version of that code though

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He's your ex. Not sure why your friend would expect you to be interested.

Kinda violates the bro-code, never date a bros ex. Not sure about the female version of that code though

The female code is basically the same, except you can date the ex, if you have consent

Ovaries before brovaries

wtf its bros b4 hoes

who said it was a date?

wtf, these codes are weird. How do you guys even find people to date like this? Do you just switch friendship groups every few years? >.>

Personally I've always found rules where you can't date exes to be immature. You do not own that person. I mean sure have some tact and don't start dating right away either, respect your friend might be hurting still. Everyone deserves to find happiness even if it's in a friend's ex.

Same rules apply - unless your gf is ok with it. Different rules for acquaintances though. This was a best friend!

This doesn't seem like a huge issue, unless the breakup was awful and/or very recent. I don't see why your friend isn't allowed to be friends with an ex of yours... Of course if those were her intentions.

Your buddy should've at least run it by you to see if you'd be cool with it, but at the end of the day they don't need your permission

I agree that friend doesn't need permission but why should she have to run it by OP?

No OP's friend doesn't need to run it by them. It would he different if OP and their friend were going to lunch and said friend invited OP's ex without telling them. But this was on their own time, away from OP and it's none of OP's business.

It's considerate of the friend to request OP's blessing, or at least give a heads up. Some people don't understand being best friends means you care about their feelings. The friend should have asked, and OP should in turn grant the blessing if the people really like each other. It's just respect.

That's a bro code rule, your buddy is not a bro

No SHE isn't a bro, you're right about that. Referring to the friend as "her" kinda made that obvious.

Bro code rule #5, as much as possible don't date your bro's ex gf unless it's true love or enough time has passed, alway ask/tell your friend first, and if your friend doesn't agree and your really in love, then you can reconsider your friendship because a real bro should never stand in the way of another bro's happiness. Real bros never break those rules.

I don't see a problem here

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.. Show it anyway

Yes, it's very clear from the FML that both the ex and best friend are hurting… somehow. And the OP is definitely a man… I guess. This is all around useful and sensical advice.

why would the best friend be hurting even?

Unless your ex was a terrible person toward you, in which case your best friend might not be a good judge of character, it really isn't any of your business. Simply because a relationship between you and someone didn't work out doesn't mean that mutual friends have to decide between you. If the friendship is maintained, it's not unreasonable for two people to have lunch together, whether friendly or romantically.

"Best friend", you dingbat. Which means this chick would have told her best friend EVERYTHING about him. Obviously OP wasn't happy about this move, on the contrary she would probably feel hurt/betrayed, which would mean said 'friend' is two faced. Use your brain???

Maybe she's trying to intercede to get you two back together ...but I doubt it

Speaking to your friend would seem like the best resolution to this issue. Explain why it makes you uncomfortable and, if she's a good friend, she'll listen and accept it.

Or if OP is a good friend, she'll realize she can't control who her friend gets to hang out with. It may be hard to witness her friend with her ex, but just because they broke up doesn't mean all her friends have to break up their friendship with him. And even though it may go against a "bro code" between friends, if OP's friend and her ex get along better romantically, why shouldn't they be allowed to date? FYL OP but I also don't think they did anything wrong, unless he was an abusive boyfriend. In that situation, it's still their prerogative to be friends, or date, but it would also be messed up for your friend to still like the guy.