I do believe I detect a bit of jealousy *sips tea* in all seriousness, that's fucked up of your friend to make you hit his dog so it'll hate you and love him. I detect future relationship issues with this one.

What if his dog likes being spanked? His plan will backfire lol

Tell them you'll spank them whenever they sit near you so the dog doesn't get jealous.

That would be when you say "fuck no, you weird dumbass" and do whatever you need to do to get that dog out of his possession. He has serious issues if he's willing to demand someone hit his pet, for any reason. People who think like that should not be allowed to have pets in the first place.

i hope you spanked him instead. obviously the dog wins

sounds like you need better friends. smack your friend instead

When I first read "spank it" I thought you were talking about something completely different.

That's a sign of a potential personality disorder.

Poor dog.

If that's his approach to life, I think we know why his dog likes you better.