Love: Today, I learned the joy of getting a brand new leather jacket... - FML

By shadowmuppet - 31/03/2017 20:00 - United States - Bronx

Today, I learned the joy of getting a brand new leather jacket and then watching my date drunkenly throw up all over my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 642

You deserved it 584

Summer: Sun, Sea and Blunders
Summer anecdotes where the sun shines... and blunders are never far away! More…

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Same thing different taste

By brittney242 - 17/12/2016 10:03 - United States - Stow

Today, while at a night club, I was wearing a brand new outfit that I absolutely loved. I was enjoying myself until I felt something wet drop onto my head and body from above. It was puke from a drunk guy in the V.I.P. section. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 664

You deserved it 648

Say it, don't spray it

By Anonymous - 18/04/2009 10:42 - United States

Today, I was at a frat band party dancing with my girl when I felt some liquid on my arm. Normally, I'll lick spilled drinks off my arms and being slightly intoxicated, I did. Then I realized it was chunky. The girl dancing next to us had puked everywhere and I licked her vomit off my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 029

You deserved it 115 241

By shwasted - 22/02/2010 05:17 - United States

Today, I had one of the worst first dates of my life. After leaving the restaurant early, we went to a party to try and salvage the night. My date then got wasted, ended up puking in the back seat of my car on the way home, then lied about it. My night ended with me cleaning vomit out of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 566

You deserved it 3 800

Classy

By dontask - 01/10/2010 01:55 - United States

Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 861

You deserved it 4 436

By Anonymous - 07/01/2011 23:42 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a date for the first time in months. Over dessert, my date told a joke, and I tittered vigorously, causing me to choke and throw up all over him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 127

You deserved it 6 362

By allennn - 14/03/2010 14:56 - France

Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 929

You deserved it 38 557

Maturity level

By Clairebear - 07/05/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I went on a date with someone I'd met online. Everything was going surprisingly well, until I knocked over my drink, spilling it all over my date's lap. In a panic, I blurted out, "Dude, did you piss yourself?" Needless to say, there will be no second date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 817

By Anonymous - 31/10/2010 18:25 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend borrowed my Jane Norman dress to wear to a Halloween party. He got hammered, threw up all over it, and fell unconscious on the shower floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 802

You deserved it 7 709

By Chaznuts - 08/09/2009 06:22 - Australia

Today, I went on a blind double date. My date was drunk before I got there. He kept getting my name wrong, and ended up spilling a glass of red wine down the front of my dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 552

You deserved it 5 205

By Mad Munki - 07/12/2017 05:00

Today, I went on the best date of my life with someone I’ve admired for a very long time. On the car ride home, she vomited all over my lap and informed me that she’s moving across the country next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 882

You deserved it 364

Next

Top comments

HanBanana15 9

Saturday 1 April 2017 3:38

Isn't one of the perks of leather the fact that everything wipes right off? My family had leather couches for years and the only thing we couldn't get off was sharpie. So unless she ate a sharpie beforehand, I'm not really seeing how the new leather jacket is relevant here.

Bliepje 22

Saturday 1 April 2017 3:33

Good thing its leather. Goes right off. Easy to clean

Comments

Bliepje 22

Saturday 1 April 2017 3:33

Good thing its leather. Goes right off. Easy to clean

HanBanana15 9

Saturday 1 April 2017 3:38

Isn't one of the perks of leather the fact that everything wipes right off? My family had leather couches for years and the only thing we couldn't get off was sharpie. So unless she ate a sharpie beforehand, I'm not really seeing how the new leather jacket is relevant here.

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 1 April 2017 3:54

What a tricky way to carry out his vegan agenda! I'll bet PETA is paying for his next six-pack.

WeirdUS 29

Saturday 1 April 2017 7:27

Problem is vomit can eat through table varnish and can easily damage a surface. I hope OP was able to get the jacket clean and their was no second date

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The Top

Today, I started my new job as a dishwasher, and was very excited since I've been broke for weeks. A few people dined and dashed, apparently for the first time in the restaurant's history. My boss is superstitious. She fired me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 885

You deserved it 2 406

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The Top

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You deserved it 5 144

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I agree, your life sucks 40 827

You deserved it 5 472

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I agree, your life sucks 39 931

You deserved it 4 543

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I agree, your life sucks 35 271

You deserved it 48 087