Today, it was my fifth wedding anniversary. After an intense lovemaking session, my husband looked lovingly into my eyes and asked, "How do you feel about polygamy?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Time flies by
Today, my husband and I are celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary. It's also the 5th anniversary of the last time he made me orgasm. FML
Backstabber
Today, I found out that my husband asked out another woman on a date five days before our 11th anniversary. FML
Wanting your cake
Today, I'm in love with my best friend, while also being in love with my wife. I know he has feelings for me too. I wish my wife was poly too. FML
Common passion
Today, I was having an intimate moment with my detachable shower head. I opened my eyes to find my husband of 4 months looking down on me. The only thing he said was, "You too?" FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML
Today, my husband decided it was time to tell me he had a 3 year old son. We have been married for 5 years. FML
Polytrouble
Today, I'm in a polyamorous relationship. My husband and my boyfriend are both aware and are okay with it. Today they met. Not only are they okay with each other, they’ve hit it off. They've drafted a schedule of which days they want, meals, and chores for me on those days. FML
Today, I met my husband's other wife. FML
You must be kidding
Today, my husband of 6 years told me he has a 5 year-old. In fact, she was conceived the night before our wedding. Apparently, the “one last time fuck as a single man” with his female bestie was too good of an opportunity to pass up. He doesn’t get why I’m not speaking to him. FML
Man child
Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML
Top comments
gonzi_fml 0
o.0 I hope he realizes that its illegal in the US
Ligerie 0
ewww....
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Comments (262)
theanonimouse 0
Sweet, I have new friends!
Vermelle 0
I just discovered that my old account has about 1500 unread messages. Yikes.
Vermelle 0
I just discovered that my old e-mail account has about 1500 unread messages... Yikes.
zargon 1
I just discovered my active email account has 8228 unread messages. Okay, I lied about just discovering that, but still. Gmail makes me too lazy, methinks.
Vermelle 0
I hate having a fairly slow internet connection sometimes... It makes double-posting all the more annoying.
theanonimouse 0
gotta love gmail. my old yahoo account had to be reactivated, so i had 0 unread emails. :)
zargon 1
That would make me so uncomfortable x_x I still have a hotmail account that I use only for MSN messenger, but I still check the email occasionally just in case I missed something. I know I didn't, but I have to make sure. The weird thing is that I'm not OCD or anything, I'm just... weird.
yumpinyiminy 0
Just tell him "gee, honey, you're already kinda failing at being a husband to ONE wife, do you really think you could handle two?"
stupidhead11 0
HA, thats awesome, why did he have a reason to say that...are you ugly?!?!
385lvrs 0
Nice prejudiced and generalized username you ignorant mofo. I'm not even Mormon and your idiocy pisses me off. Go educate yourself. YDI for being an all around moron.
sickinlove13 0
Wow! What a shitty scumbag!
hellomynameisyou 0
that is sick
TuucciZ 0
If he's polyamorous, it can't be helped. That's what he is. I agree on that it might not be good for you, but it's not like he's guilty for that. People, stop treating him as a criminal and bad person.