Today, it was my fifth wedding anniversary. After an intense lovemaking session, my husband looked lovingly into my eyes and asked, "How do you feel about polygamy?" FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Time flies by
Today, my husband and I are celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary. It's also the 5th anniversary of the last time he made me orgasm. FML
Backstabber
Today, I found out that my husband asked out another woman on a date five days before our 11th anniversary. FML
Wanting your cake
Today, I'm in love with my best friend, while also being in love with my wife. I know he has feelings for me too. I wish my wife was poly too. FML
Common passion
Today, I was having an intimate moment with my detachable shower head. I opened my eyes to find my husband of 4 months looking down on me. The only thing he said was, "You too?" FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML
Today, my husband decided it was time to tell me he had a 3 year old son. We have been married for 5 years. FML
Polytrouble
Today, I'm in a polyamorous relationship. My husband and my boyfriend are both aware and are okay with it. Today they met. Not only are they okay with each other, they’ve hit it off. They've drafted a schedule of which days they want, meals, and chores for me on those days. FML
Today, I met my husband's other wife. FML
You must be kidding
Today, my husband of 6 years told me he has a 5 year-old. In fact, she was conceived the night before our wedding. Apparently, the “one last time fuck as a single man” with his female bestie was too good of an opportunity to pass up. He doesn’t get why I’m not speaking to him. FML
Man child
Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML
Top comments
gonzi_fml 0
o.0 I hope he realizes that its illegal in the US
Ligerie 0
ewww....
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Comments (262)
wutevs88 0
just thought id let you know that polygamy is NOT a mormon thing and most mormons wud take ur sn very offensively......
More_Man 0
First, Mormons do not practice polygamy. Second, I doubt any Mormon would want to marry someone as ignorant as you.
Nick402 0
This reminds me of Big Love. lol.
goodlifelvr 0
Well, the whole situation depends on how you think. If your are interested in it, then i guess you'd have no problem. But, obviously your not, because you posted it on fmylife.com, so obviously its a big F to the life. Maybe its just something he's been interested or just curious about. Then you should just have a talk with him. But if your that kind of person, then you can just like bitch slap him and walk out or what ever you wana do but most people arnt like that. unless he was just jocking. Then everything ive said sounds like stuck up bull shit.
rustyrox 0
well was he kidding??
dramakat11 0
If that's something he seriously wants and you don't then you might have to divorce. If my bf expressed a desire for something like that I'd drop him in an instant. It wouldn't matter to me if it was just a slight desire. I want my man to only express interest in being with me. Period.
retep014 0
First of all, at 113: Why can't we take every opportunity to discuss an issue and perhaps learn a thing or two along the way? Personally I think a discussion of this magnitude coming from something as simple as an FML, a simple posting on a site meant for humor, shows that people have capacity and desire to learn, even if they don't know it. I think that the day when free discussion is banned worldwide (not that it'd ever happen) would become known as the day intelligence started to die. Onto the actual FML: Obviously your husband was a dick. FYL for that. I agree with everyone who has said that he should have approached it differently if he was serious about it, said it at a different time if it was a joke, or pulled his head out of his ass if he wanted just loose sex. For the larger issue Normally I'm the kind who is supportive of change, especially when it comes to marriage, however in this case I'm not sure where I stand. I do not for a second believe that polygamy is immoral...in the same way that I believe communism isn't immoral or wrong. If practiced correctly, both are perfectly harmless if all parties involved agree. However, communism turned into one person or group taking advantage of the system to gain whatever they wanted and absolute power at the expense of everyone else involved. Polygamy is the same way. It isn't wrong, but often it is used to enforce a belief that some cultures have in oppression of women. I do believe that oppression is wrong, but in those cases polygamy can't be blamed and labeled as "immoral" simply because it was the instrument used to oppress. That'd be like putting a gun on trial for a murder. Silly, right? As far as morality within this country (USA), I believe the answer to that lies in this country's first document: the Declaration of Independence: "We hold these truths to be self evident that all [people] are created equal and that they are endowed by their creator with certain [irrevocable] rights, that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness." I'm not going to pretend that I knew what the founding fathers had in mind when they wrote this, nor am I going to say that I'm not stretching these words, feel free to debate me if you feel I have misunderstood them. However, I would like to call the attention to the "pursuit of happiness" part. If people can be happy in a polyamorous or polygamous relationship, why shouldn't they be allowed to do so? The only reason I don't know where I stand is because in spite of all I've just said, something about it just doesn't sit right with me. I'm not saying it's wrong morally, I'm just not sure. It might just be, as some people have suggested, the part of me that clings to the social norms of society. Personally, it'd never work with me. I'm not saying that it wouldn't work for someone else, just not my thing. Finally, to all of those who say children can't for arguments, I'm 17, still a child by all standards. These are just my opinions though. Please feel free to debate anything I've said. Forgive me my spelling and grammatical errors and correct any misuses of terminology I've used.
benjiadc123 0
Oh my holy **** this is long, I'm all for learning but I came here for humor, not a collage course
ohhhhman 0
OP: I noticed that your name is "nonmormon" did you know that mormons don't practice polygamy? they can't be members if they do. gah, i hate how ignorant people are about other people's religions. any questions? go to www.lds.org and then you won't have to pretend that you know something. my best friend is a mormon...and i'm pretty sure she has one mom... kthanks.
Pretty_Delicious 0
Yup...I'm Mormon. Last I checked I only have one dad and one mom....as do all the other members. Crazy, eh?
drkwlf 0
YDI for not being pretty enough to be the only one your man wants to ****. (:!
Jerret 6
Either he's Mormon, or you just live in Utah... I'm guessing #2 (lol, not serious about the first, My girlfriend's Mormon)