Wanting your cake

By Anonymous - 20/01/2021 11:01 - United States - Dayton

Today, I'm in love with my best friend, while also being in love with my wife. I know he has feelings for me too. I wish my wife was poly too. FML
I agree, your life sucks 360
You deserved it 1 107

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You made a commitment to your wife when you married her, and you should stick to that and control your feelings. You knew what the deal was when you signed up for it and it’s a bit late in the game to try and change that on her, especially if she’s not interested. In fact, letting yourself develop feelings like that could be considered a form of emotional infidelity. Get things together woman (or man).

It is cheating if the other person you are with is not poly and did not accept that from the start of the relationship. Genuine Poly relationships are built on honesty and trust. Oh, and pretty much ANYONE can love more than one person. It's SHARING a person that's far more difficult.

Comments

Try offering her a cracker?

Dean Roberts 7

frustrating when most people believe poly is cheating. some people can just love more than one person

It is cheating if the other person you are with is not poly and did not accept that from the start of the relationship. Genuine Poly relationships are built on honesty and trust. Oh, and pretty much ANYONE can love more than one person. It's SHARING a person that's far more difficult.

You made a commitment to your wife when you married her, and you should stick to that and control your feelings. You knew what the deal was when you signed up for it and it’s a bit late in the game to try and change that on her, especially if she’s not interested. In fact, letting yourself develop feelings like that could be considered a form of emotional infidelity. Get things together woman (or man).

That’s cheating on your wife emotionally. Stop.

I feel your pain. Being poly when your partner isn't sucks a lot.

Is being Poly something that you just discovered about yourself? Either way talk to your wife. Communication is so important before you make any big changes. Good luck, it didn't work for me but my parents had one that worked.

My friends were poly. Until she met somebody that she fell in love with and divorced her husband so she could marry her new man and be not poly anymore.

Sounds like your wife would be better off without you in the long run.

Amanda G Rich 23

So many people shaming polyamory. This should have been discussed before marriage but sometimes you just don't plan on falling in love with other people. My advice it to communicate your feelings to your wife and give her some time to process it. For the time being, all of you should educated yourself on ethical non monogamy. you're wife doesn't have to be poly if she doesn't want to but she can support YOU being poly. there are groups for "couples" like that that can help all of you. The fml I'm guessing is that you're stuck in between choosing who to be with. and honestly, I'd choose your wife. you've established that you are compatible and have lived together and been through more trials. So to let that go would be a little silly. If you disagree, it's your life and happiness.

if you new this. than you should have chosen wisely .. you made a vow and committed... so now you need to get your self out of drowning before you sink (lose someone close)