I kick ass.
And there's only two things that need to be known. I hate U2. I hate Texans. If you're a U2 loving Texan, I hope you get set on fire and penetrated by overly-endowed bulls. Just sayin'.
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It's in the can!
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten! -
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit. -
The thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments. -
The return of the thumb
You have thumbed 5000 comments. -
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date. -
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date. -
Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date. -
One more and it's business time
You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
By Cellismasher - /
Wednesday 4 November 2009 22:37 /
United States
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it I decided to whisper in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I hear behind me, "I am." FML
By unbelievable208 - /
Wednesday 5 August 2009 05:28 /
United States
Today, it was my wedding day, and while I was standing next to my husband in front of all of our guests, I was rocking on my heels because I was nervous. I rocked too far and fell backward. My husband didn't come to help me up. He just said at the top of his lungs, "FAIL!" FML
By thefailure - /
Sunday 2 August 2009 04:21 /
United States