Intimacy: Today, it started pouring while I was in the middle of a pizza... - FML

By womboman - 30/07/2011 20:02 - United States

Spicy

Today, it started pouring while I was in the middle of a pizza delivery. I had to stand out in the rain for ten minutes while an old redneck dude wearing nothing but camo boxers fumbled around for the exact change to pay the bill. I think seeing his junk was supposed to count as my tip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 776

You deserved it 3 227

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Same thing different taste

By micheal - 21/06/2011 16:52 - United States

Today, while I was delivering pizza in the torrential downpour, I waited 5 minutes in the pouring rain for an old lady to dig 20 bucks out of her purse. Her total was $19.99. She told me to keep the change and make lots of money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 805

You deserved it 3 545

By ronniewciv - 30/12/2010 07:48

Today, I was delivering pizza in the rain. A woman answered the door, saw me soaking wet and said, "Wow this rain is terrible, it must be horrible to be out delivering in it." She then tipped me 21 cents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 574

You deserved it 3 763

Currency

By PizzaBwaaay - 03/05/2022 22:00

Today, I was delivering pizzas and hit up a dude’s house who ordered two boxes of extra large. He gave me the exact change. I asked him, “What about the tip?” He paused for a minute, let out this loud rancid fart and said, “There’s your tip bub, now piss off!” and shut the door in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 857

You deserved it 1 449

By Cano951 - 16/12/2011 20:16 - United States

Today, I was bitched out by a pizza delivery man. I didn't have the cash to pay him for a pizza I didn't even order. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 384

You deserved it 2 608

It never rains, it pours

By jaeilssanguh - 26/11/2009 18:49 - United States

Today, I was walking in rain. I had my hands in my pants pockets, so that the front of the jacket was pointing down. Halfway to Taco Bell, my crotch felt exceptionally wet. I looked down to see a wet spot. The rain on my jacket was channeled to my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 063

You deserved it 6 159

All in a day's work

By Steve-noh - 10/08/2018 23:30

Today, at my job as a waiter I sharted myself while taking an order. They tipped me $20 and wrote "for new underwear" on the receipt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 154

You deserved it 589

By rained - 02/02/2009 05:44 - Hong Kong

Spicy

Today, I drove an hour in a rainstorm to go see my boyfriend. Thirty minutes and a blow job later, he tells me he's going to meet some friends for dinner in half an hour then kicks me out of his house. It's still raining. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 479

You deserved it 7 706

By dammit33 - 28/05/2012 13:55 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I got a $20 tip from an old lady I delivered pizza to. Ecstatic, I walked back to my car where there was a $30 parking fine waiting for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 794

You deserved it 8 904

Stormy weather

By Anonymous - 20/09/2020 17:00 - United Stated - Portland

Today, I was about to have sex with my long-term boyfriend, when it started to rain. He was so interested in the storm that he left me half naked to look outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 131

You deserved it 235

Protip

By Tipless - 07/11/2009 05:36 - United States

Today, I was working as a Valet driver. After getting no customers for 5 hours in the pouring rain, a woman driving by stops and asks me for directions. Before leaving, she said, "I should probably tip you for that, since that's probably the only money you'd get all night." She didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 940

You deserved it 2 468

Next

Top comments

Thabb 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 1:08

You should be honored, to rednecks that's a huge achievement.

Salvikidd 6

Sunday 31 July 2011 1:27

did you see his 16 year old wife?

Comments

RealDjRatchet 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 20:06

get a real job

jren207 24

Monday 1 August 2011 1:00

Did you shake his hand?

ruthfus 4

Monday 1 August 2011 1:57

seexy ;)

xocutexofunnyxo 5

Monday 1 August 2011 2:53

G-R-O-S-S

Warcraft_looser 7

Monday 1 August 2011 7:07

you know you liked it haha :)

einsteintechn9ne 0

Monday 1 August 2011 8:07

why were you looking there anyway?

SlaveToRetail 10

Monday 1 August 2011 8:07

I can't help but wonder if you delivered pizza to my idiot ex...

gonzolo 3

Monday 1 August 2011 14:57

His tip was your tip!

forbiddenfruit69 3

Tuesday 2 August 2011 2:32

Must have been a small tip then

baccaz16 0

Tuesday 2 August 2011 8:22

At least u gotta see em

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Keywords

Transportation Cars Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Kids Fire Food Capitalism Money Miscellaneous Clothes AITA Thief Intimacy Health Death Birthday Sex Disability Abuse Love Fish Camping Vegan Holidays Ableism Video games Geek

The Top

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The Top

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You deserved it 6 715

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I agree, your life sucks 12 506

You deserved it 1 768

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I agree, your life sucks 2 013

You deserved it 261

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I agree, your life sucks 45 657

You deserved it 3 751

Today, I went to the dentist and found out I still have a wisdom tooth. I got all four out last summer… or at least I thought I did. Now I have to go back and get it removed. Again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 325

You deserved it 196

Today, after I got reacquainted with an old friend with whom it'd been 12 years since we last spoke, both divorced, with kids, we started talking, start feeling things for each other. We'd both agreed to take things slow. We spend an amazing weekend together, made plans to spend my birthday together, and then I was ghosted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 457

You deserved it 156