By excusemeprincess - 11/02/2013 17:08 - United States - Middle Island

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. He really likes Legend of Zelda, so I put on a Link hat, took my clothes off, and waited for him at his place. He came home with a hooker. FML
I agree, your life sucks 57 783
You deserved it 4 260

excusemeprincess tells us more.

I'm the person who posted this. I just forgot to log in. Anyway, I DID kick him in his deku nuts and walk out on him. Thanks for all your hilarious comments guys. :)

Top comments

Wow. I feel like a cliche comment should go here. like. "I hope you dump him" or something along those lines. Because you really deserve better than that. Nobody should have to put up with some guy doing that kind of stuff.

Comments

septemberpeaches 8

Hope you brought enough costumes for everybody ;)

DKjazz 20

I don't recommend using the Minish cap as a condom.

Boy, anyone who thinks this girl should have dressed as a different character should Youtube search "freddie w zelda pot smasher" to see how wrong you are. OP did good and deserves better.

There's also a Lindsey Stirling rendition of the same concept, only it features badass violin music and, of course, pot-smashing awesomeness.

murphdarkly 13

Wow checked out FreddieW she's super hot in the Link costume

Take the hat, his game AND his hooker and leave. That'll teach him.

no op, it's not a hooker! it's called a hookshot.

perdix 29

Was her name Zelda? I'll bet he gave her an extra $20 to say so. Sounds like Zelda: The Gonorrhea of Time.

What I don't understand is why the **** he felt the need to PAY for a hooker when he's with someone who is willing to dress up (or down ;) ) and surprise him with sex.

unknown_user5566 26

Cheaters are not logical people. All he probably cared about was getting something unique, and he didn't stop to consider that he had a lady at home willing to provide him with a new experience.

Awkward...! Threesome? Too much, huh? Yeah... Might wanna rethink the BF. And schedule a trip to the gyno for an STD screen.