Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend told me he was too busy studying for finals, but that he'd take me out another day instead. He later drunk-dialled me from a party demanding a lift back home. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had promised that the day would belong to me. But no, I had to drive 80km forth and back to pick him up from work, then he took pictures with his new camera lens, then he decided what to eat, demanded a massage, and then he just fell asleep. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend made me breakfast in bed, then we went out shopping, had a picnic, watched a good romcom, had a fancy dinner, and ended the day with great sex. And when the clock struck twelve, he dumped me. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I woke up to a text message from my boyfriend, breaking up with me. When I commented on his impeccably bad timing, he admitted he'd forgotten it was my birthday. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me to stay home, because he wanted to come by to give me a birthday surprise. Later on, he came by, posted a note, rung the bell and left. The note was a break up note. FML
Today, my boyfriend got a hotel room with a jacuzzi, drinks, and tickets to Six Flags for my birthday. He is currently passed out drunk on the other side of the bed, cursing me out in his sleep. FML
Today, I planned a surprise birthday party for my boyfriend. I invited all his friends and made all his favorite food. He was running very late, so I called to ask what was taking so long. His response? He said he was at his house, with the very friends I was standing next to. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had been telling me for the past two weeks that he had something planned for the occasion. His plan? Me watching TV with his parents, who hate me, while he went to work. His gift? A brand new Xbox 360 for himself. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to his best friend’s birthday party. He got her red roses, a necklace and $100 Victoria’s Secret Gift Card. This year he forgot my birthday, gave me a hug and told me to leave his apartment because he had homework to do. We’ve been together for two years. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he wanted to throw me a surprise birthday party. The only issue was the fact I didn't have any friends to make it happen. FML
Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend of almost 4 years completely forgot. FML
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Top comments
FMLandurstoo 9
Give him a ride to a gay bar far out of town and leave him there.
Dotell95 3
Tell him you can't because your busy studying
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Comments (159)
808Lol 0
love em then leave *Him op
Chynna92 0
That is effed up, its YOUR birthday and he ditched it for a party, kick him to the curb!
aardvarkish 17
ROFL thank you
Sammie246 5
Hahaha I wonder if he was makin out with another girl at the party...
A7XforREVer_225 1
today is my birthday too
katieklein 0
dump him.!
sarahfrogger 0
dump his nasty ass!
merrilln 7
just dump him. he's not even worth crying over.
beckham_732 3
do him drunk then dump his ass!!!
taytoc 10
shoulda hung up and said "goodbye, new ex boyfriend!"