Today, it's been a full week since my last orthodontist appointment and I still can't eat anything besides Slimfast and pudding. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I just got back from school with my mouth feeling like a bomb site, and also very hungry. I just got my braces installed yesterday, and I have to wear them for 18 months. I can barely eat anything solid, which means I will be hungry more often. It's going to be an awesome 18 months trying to focus on school! FML
Today, I lost a tooth and got my jaw wired shut after my toddler managed to break my jaw by whacking me with a plastic toy. Hello at least 8 weeks of being unable to talk while only eating meals that have been thoroughly blitzed into a liquid form first. FML
Today, I broke a tooth. It’s Friday. Not a single dentist office is open. The good news? I might lose those last few pounds as I can’t drink or eat without excruciating pain. Needless to say, it’s going to be a long weekend. FML
Today, I had eight teeth removed in preparation for getting my braces fitted. My winter break will now consists of barely being able to sleep or eat, tasting blood, and looking like a goofy-ass chipmunk. FML
Today, after having my jaw wired shut for 2 months, I finally got to eat. During the first bite of my sandwich I pulled my jaw out of place. FML
Today, I went to the dentist to have a tooth pulled. The day before, I was too anxious to eat anything, so I went in with an empty stomach. There were complications during the extraction and now I'm not allowed to eat for the next 24 hours. FML
Today, the dentist told me I needed to have two of my wisdom teeth on opposite ends of my mouth pulled. I suppose a liquid diet won't be all that bad. FML
Today, I was eating ice cream and struggling to chew a particularly hard chunk of chocolate. After finally breaking it into pieces, I spat it out because it tasted terrible. Then I discovered that I was missing my temporary crown. Now I have no upper molar. FML
Today, I'm in the hospital and it's been 44 hours since I've eaten anything. My doctors won't let me eat and my parents are sitting across the room, eating. FML
Today, my orthodontist thought it would be a good idea to put braces on the teeth in the very back. One bracket popped off twice, after which he shoved a metal band in my mouth onto one of my teeth, cutting my gums, and causing gushing blood. Now, I can’t eat anything unless it’s baby food and I have a lisp. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
What about yogurt? Juice? Smoothies? Cream of wheat? You lying sack of excrement.
shesaywha 19
nooooooooo, rectal surgery -_-
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Comments (119)
AWESOMExPOSSUM 0
suck it up pussy!!!
sexxxysydney 14
hahahahahahah
Sammara 0
If you don't eat other foods, OF COURSE your teeth won't adjust to eating them! At the very least, try gritting your teeth, slowly, to get them and you used to the pressure. And eat a damn sandwich or something.
maybaybe 0
Oh poor you. Suck it up and stop being such a crybaby! A lot of people visit the orthodontist and can't eat solid food. Why can't you eat ice-cream, yogurt etc. other than just pudding and slimfast?
raya_kz 7
At least you'll lose weight:)
kviera72 0
I recommend a heavy dose of man the **** up
sarahXskitzo 0
you think that's bad? i've had to go a whole month without eating real food because of braces.
jenn8504 0
they have to drink slimfast for nutrients!
lindsaymiedema 4
pussy
AnthonyMoye 1
If you're a woman this is probably a good thing.
ittybritt 0
Pasta, over cook it a little bit so that it's softer, but it's great instead of liquid foods