Today, in high school, we had a presentation about sex, condoms, etc. After a while, the lady explained that we should get to know our sexual organs better. "For example, my daughter looks at her vagina in front of a mirror to check it out." I’m her daughter. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML
Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
True
Today, I found out that my 8-year-old daughter somehow learned how babies are made. Sort of. I found this out when we had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When one teacher asked where she was from, she replied, "My daddy's balls." FML
Today, I had to make a doctor's appointment for my daughter. Apparently she thought it would be better to wipe herself with Clorox tough scrub disinfecting wipes than tell me she'd caught an STD. FML
Great opener
Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated, "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Kids, eh?
Today, I was with my four year-old daughter when we met an elderly, rather wrinkled woman I know. My daughter looked at her for a while and then asked, "Why doesn’t your skin fit your face?" FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I was giving myself a breast exam for lumps. I heard laughing, looked around and saw that the 12 year-old neighbor and his friends were watching through the window. FML
Top comments
iburppeopleup 0
wow why would your mom even KNOW that?
Kesler_17 0
That is horrifying. Parents seem to lose all social skill when it comes to their children's lives.
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Comments (186)
_se7en_780 0
how does your mom even know that??
Doortje 30
If her mother's job is to give presentations about sex etc. OP probably has been forced to look at her ****** every month since she was 4.
RUSH777 0
You're cute. =]
himom12 0
imm gonna look at my ****** through a hand mirror, lmmfao I think tht was from the movie date night. bahahha.
BonJovi821 3
Hoooly shit I laughed so hard at that. I love that movie.
emmeau 1
hahaha I love that movie :)
iheartdance 6
omg best movie ever!! I think I was laughing the entire time!
xStiina 0
Your mum likes walking in on you?
ajlatrace 2
Its your fault, STOP LOOKING AT UR VAG IN THE MIRROR (especially since peope obviously knew)
RedPillSucks 33
OP sounds young. There's nothing wrong with being curious.
unfortunate_13 5
every healthy woman has already checked out her ******. if not, stop being a prude, it's your own body, you should atleast know what it looks like.
mrahhhhh 21
Is there a specific gene that turns people into assholes when talking about their children? Science, fix that shit. Now!
KVKdragon 26
I'm starting to think that too. I feel like parents don't know how to talk about their kids positively at all.
DocBastard 40
Fact: parents MUST embarrass their children. Sorry kids, it's in the Parents' Handbook, section 4, subsection 2b, page 47. We have to do it or else face dire consequences.
FYLDeep 26
Honesty, I thought it was somewhere on the first page. Then again, that might just be a special abridged version without all the specifics.
DocBastard 40
No, section one is all about procreation. Discussing the exact nature of their conception with your children at every available opportunity is on page 48 (subsection 2b, see above). I should stop now. I've said too much already...
rattusrattus 19
If parents want to embarress their kids they can do it by dad dancing and pictures of them as babies in embarressing costumes and excessive hugging. This is a step too far. And yeah, I think embarress is spelt wrong but it's the closest I'm gonna get.
youngclench 0
Woahhh, Doc's kids look dope as shit! (in a good way) He's probably an awsome father, or a creep with pictures of other's kids. Either way I look up to him.
Banana_Pancakes6 0
Are the consiquences the same as pulling the tag off a matress?
Ranimal 12
Well at least your mom left out that you carry on full conversations with your ****** also.
leishababyx 0
lol :L
WiseGuy79 14
If I had a vajayjay I'd be looking at it in a mirror all damn day too so don't feel so embarrassed
skanky 4
you should be embarrassed to be a grown man and use the word vajayjay
fthku 13
You should be embarressed about having pink hair. Or not. I guess you'll be embarressed about what you like. Just like WiseGuy.
talb1 7
There is nothing wrong with pink hair.
lovexbox 8
#59 Wins XD
hardcore1414 0
you only say that because you have never seen one or that you're tired of looking at 5 year olds " vajayjay "
Sammansix 3
Hoe does your mom know that? *giggles*
Sammansix 3
Fishy situation.
daAce77 8
haha clever!
AWESOMExPOSSUM 0
cuz that's what they sme- I get it