Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML
Today, I was woken by my alarm. I got really tangled up in my blankets, and struggled frantically to untangle myself so I could turn off the alarm. I not only kneed myself in the face, but I accidentally punched myself in the nuts too. Hard. FML
Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML
Today, I woke up from a nap and thought I felt somebody's arm in my bed. I frantically start hitting it and start screaming. I soon realized it was my own arm. I'd fallen asleep on it, and it was completely numb, I couldn't feel a thing. FML
Today, I tried to high-five someone but somehow ended up slapping them in the face. FML
Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML
Today, I was trying to swat a wasp in my bedroom. I got so frustrated that I ended up punching myself in the face. The wasp is still here, and now I look like I've been in a brawl. FML
Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML
Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
Have a wank, it will feel like someone else is doing it. You may as well use this opportunity.
ebonyirony 29
Nice one, Rocky.
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Comments (98)
tnttse 6
Perfect time to do the 'stranger'
thatoneguy79 10
So, there I was just sleeping in this morning when the rest of my body decided it wanted to get up. Now, I had worked hard the day before, and frankly I was tired. However the rest of my body was insistent that it wanted to get up, so I reached up and punch Head right in the face. Still had to get up, but at least I had the upper hand. Maybe next time she will give me the elbow room so I can sleep. -Arm
pokefan813 16
35 - I agree, and don't get me started on the magikarp jokes...
linkinpark98 24
I've done this before as well. Except I clocked myself in the jaw and almost chipped a tooth. :/
sadistic_chemica 0
The ol stranger punch
BoogerDawson 6
I have the same problem with my immense schlong when my leg lays on it and end up with a numb old fella....
uumlaut_strohson 3
is it even possible to donkey punch yourself?
Choconumm 8
Least you know your face is awake now
pbonham 22
BAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I could so imagine someone doing that!!! This made my day!!!
alopez11389 0
Same crap happened to me one time... I give you my sympathy lol