Today, I went to the public library for the first time ever. The librarian told me I couldn't get a library card because I had an outstanding balance of $130.00 from 1995. I was born in 1991. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was paying for groceries when the cashier asked if I wanted cash back. I said yes and handed over my card. She stared at me and said, “You're using a library card.” I'd pulled the wrong card out of my wallet. FML
Today, I went to a library to return a book that I've had for years. After a heated discussion with the librarian, not only did she charge me over a hundred dollars for the book, she also called the cops to escort me out. FML
Today, I found out that someone found my lost library card, and instead of returning it, took out multiple items. If they don't return them, I'm on the hook to paying over $100 for them. FML
Today, I tried to return a library book sneakily to avoid the overdue fine. I slid it on the counter but the scanner screamed, lights flashed, and the librarian announced my humiliatingly overdue name like a game show host. FML
Today, I finally got my ass into gear and went to the DMV to renew my driver's license. I waited in line for over two hours, only to find out that I had brought my library card instead of my license. FML
Today, I went to the library to bring back some books, I walked up to the counter and the librarian turned to me and said "What can I do for you young man?" I'm a girl. FML
Today, I learned I have over $10,000 in debt, despite never owning a credit card. Apparently, my ex-roommate had been replying to the credit card offers I was receiving in the mail. That also explains my missing driver's license a few months back. FML
Today, I was at the library. I went near the computer section when I saw this man cursing and pounding his fists on a computer. He left. I thought I'd check it out. As I sat down, a librarian came over with the security guard and pointed at me. I'm now being fined for destroying public property. FML
Today, I rushed from work so I could get to the library to return a book that was due. The library closes at 7:00 p.m. I arrived at 6:56, huffing and puffing. The lady saw me, slammed the door in my face, and locked it. I now have to pay a late fee for 4 minutes. FML
Today, I got a letter from the IRS informing me that I owed a debt of $80 dollars from 4 years ago, and that it has now grown to over $800 dollars, and it's due this month. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
tomal0 6
Did you forget to return "Everybody Poops?"
Stazza11 27
Kudos to you, I couldn't even shit properly at that age and you were a hardcore book nerd!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (58)
sometimessam 16
I'm very impressed. You must have been a very well-read four year-old, OP.
Lovelymuffinn 5
Matilda movie?
macho_nacho 7
So you're telling me you're a 23 year old who hadn't been to the library until this year?! The library is my life!
nurchok 15
Whatever he/she said, take that in writing, take it to the police, and bring back a police statement, which should be enough evidence for them that you are not who they think you are.
fantasyworld 39
How have you never been to a library for 23 years of your life?
I'madumbass 19
I am pleasantly surprised. You are only 4 and you are using this app. You will thank yourself in about 10 years as a teenager when your friends are like me and need to look up stuff like what...certain things.....are on the Internet. Keep this up, OP.
randybryant799 21
Couldn't you easily show your ID and prove how old you are?