Today, I went to the public library for the first time ever. The librarian told me I couldn't get a library card because I had an outstanding balance of $130.00 from 1995. I was born in 1991. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was paying for groceries when the cashier asked if I wanted cash back. I said yes and handed over my card. She stared at me and said, “You're using a library card.” I'd pulled the wrong card out of my wallet. FML
Today, I went to a library to return a book that I've had for years. After a heated discussion with the librarian, not only did she charge me over a hundred dollars for the book, she also called the cops to escort me out. FML
Today, I found out that someone found my lost library card, and instead of returning it, took out multiple items. If they don't return them, I'm on the hook to paying over $100 for them. FML
Today, I tried to return a library book sneakily to avoid the overdue fine. I slid it on the counter but the scanner screamed, lights flashed, and the librarian announced my humiliatingly overdue name like a game show host. FML
Today, I finally got my ass into gear and went to the DMV to renew my driver's license. I waited in line for over two hours, only to find out that I had brought my library card instead of my license. FML
Today, I went to the library to bring back some books, I walked up to the counter and the librarian turned to me and said "What can I do for you young man?" I'm a girl. FML
Today, I learned I have over $10,000 in debt, despite never owning a credit card. Apparently, my ex-roommate had been replying to the credit card offers I was receiving in the mail. That also explains my missing driver's license a few months back. FML
Today, I was at the library. I went near the computer section when I saw this man cursing and pounding his fists on a computer. He left. I thought I'd check it out. As I sat down, a librarian came over with the security guard and pointed at me. I'm now being fined for destroying public property. FML
Today, I rushed from work so I could get to the library to return a book that was due. The library closes at 7:00 p.m. I arrived at 6:56, huffing and puffing. The lady saw me, slammed the door in my face, and locked it. I now have to pay a late fee for 4 minutes. FML
Today, I got a letter from the IRS informing me that I owed a debt of $80 dollars from 4 years ago, and that it has now grown to over $800 dollars, and it's due this month. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
tomal0 6
Did you forget to return "Everybody Poops?"
Stazza11 27
Kudos to you, I couldn't even shit properly at that age and you were a hardcore book nerd!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (58)
hxnnxh 14
'Having fun isn't hard, when you've got a Library Card' - Arthur
amisenho 11
It's the start of "Fahrenheit 451"!
coppersmith 13
You started reading at the age of 4... and took 19 years to finish your first book?... you are the dumbest child prodigy I have ever come across
McMelons 9
I get this, I'm too worried that the fees my mum got on "my" library card as a kid will be given to me to pay if I go to the library
andro6657 10
The stuff you do when you're 4 always comes back to haunt you!
alicat13 12
So why did you not return your Cat in the Hat?
Jghaugland 6
Swiggity swoogity that sucks booty.
lynds71 12
I'm concerned that you are like 23 years old and that's your first time at the public library...
JJ_86 22
OP had got all the knowledge (s)he could have by the age of 4. There never was a need to visit the library.
BeepBeepSwerve 9
"like 23 years old" lol i was born in 1992 and I'm 21...
QueenSaru 28
@80, OP would be between 22 years & 7 months old and 23 years old if they were born in 1991. So yes, 'like 23' while slang and 'around 23' should have been used instead, #77 is still correct.
PhoenixRiver 10
sounds like a job for the mystery inc. within two weeks I owe 32 bucks :/
tracyswingkid 8
I am a librarian. We see this every day. You were too young to get a library card on your own. Your mom (or dad) got one for you, checked out a stack of books, then never returned them. We mostly see this when the parents have maxed out the fines on their own cards and get cut off. Try working with the library. They usually just want their books back or for you to pay for replacements. Be honest and nice.