Miscellaneous: Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started...

By Anonymous - 09/07/2013 16:07 - United States - Katy

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 737

You deserved it 23 075

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Same thing different taste

By Higgs - 02/06/2009 19:10 - United States

Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 127

You deserved it 6 201

By Dr.Octopus454 - 07/10/2011 14:58 - United Kingdom

Today, working as a life guard, I walked through the changing room to go back to the pool. On the way, a naked old man started up a conversation with me. We talked for 10 minutes about pool chemicals, while his penis wobbled around with every small movement. This happens all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 141

You deserved it 3 620

By Anonymous - 12/07/2013 20:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 625

You deserved it 6 644

By Thanks dicks - 07/09/2018 06:00

Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 727

You deserved it 363

By Anonymous - 03/04/2011 17:31 - United States

Today, sun was shining and I felt confident enough to go sunbathing at the beach. In only my bikini and towel, I laid out to get some sun. A while later, a little girl came up to me and said, "Aren't you embarrassed that you're so huge?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 513

You deserved it 11 248

By iannie - 31/07/2011 21:45 - United States

Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 384

You deserved it 39 496

By heyyoitsapotato - 31/05/2013 02:35 - United States

Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 125

You deserved it 3 297

By Embarrassed Swimmer - 11/12/2011 07:23 - Australia

Today, I went to the pool with my new white bathers. I felt really good about myself because everyone was staring at me until this hot guy came up to me and said "Dude, your bathers are see-through. You need to shave!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 774

You deserved it 18 549

By babyeaternomnom - 30/06/2012 16:22 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I caught my elderly neighbour skinny-dipping in my pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 882

You deserved it 2 324

By ouch - 29/02/2012 19:18 - Italy

Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 116

You deserved it 2 857

caitiebug1119 15

Tuesday 9 July 2013 22:37

Your life sucks, but I gotta ask: did you not feel a breeze or something down there?

flashback.miss 28

Tuesday 9 July 2013 22:37

Parents jumping to conclusions, @@ but yeah, 1 has a point, didn't you feel a draft or was it warm at the pool? Hopefully you explained and things worked out okay. Just take a lesson to double check your clothes next time. :)

Comments

notsoluckypup 12

Wednesday 10 July 2013 4:22

Hope it wasn't small or the show would've been for nothing...

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Wednesday 10 July 2013 4:28

Wow, I never knew of a guy who intentionally tanned. But besides that, seriously, tell your pants it's not polite to point. :p

RedPillSucks 31

Wednesday 10 July 2013 18:43

really? Every beach I go to is full of them.

chabelo 10

Wednesday 10 July 2013 5:27

sometimes the breeze goes inside the pants, but the point here is why did she notice the hole? whos the perv here?

strapper88 6

Wednesday 10 July 2013 5:48

Couldn't just stick to the old hole in the pants pocket trick?

thatgirlkat 9

Wednesday 10 July 2013 5:56

Peek-A-Boo Penis.

Keystonematt 9

Wednesday 10 July 2013 6:02

I thought only chicks went "tanning" maybe you should have it removed

mrlaidback992 5

Wednesday 10 July 2013 6:28

Because having a accidental bloodstain on ones crotch, a string hanging out, or a lip is not as weird.

Iniezian 18

Wednesday 10 July 2013 6:45

You may not realize this yet, but you are EXTREMELY lucky if all she did was tell you to "put it away". If she called the cops, then knowing the extremely draconian US sex offender laws, you'd most likely be looking at up to a decade in prison followed by a lifetime on a public sex offender registry.