Today, I went to my local coffee shop. I soon witnessed the girl making my drink apparently dislodge a wedgie from her ass-crack and then sneeze into her hands. When I confronted her, she loudly accused me of "visually molesting" her. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I went to grab a coffee at a new café in town. While sipping my coffee, I noticed a man staring at me through the window. I thought he was browsing the menu before I looked up mid-sip to him staring at me in the eye, sucking on his finger. FML
Today, a woman started breastfeeding her infant in a restaurant. Disgusted, I told her to take it to the bathroom, as I was eating. In response, she squirted me with milk then went back to ignoring me. FML
Today, I saw an elderly woman struggling to reach the top shelf in my local grocery store, so I went over and asked if she needed help. She then accused me of flirting with her and had me escorted from the property. FML
Today, while working the drive-through, a woman ordered a large coffee with four creams. I handed her the coffee, and she took a sip. She then hurled it at me, screaming, "I said four creams, not five!" and sped off, leaving me drenched in hot coffee. FML
Today, I was dining out with friends. I saw a mom instructing her young child to go to empty tables and take whatever cash had been left. I discreetly told the manager. He confronted the woman and pointed right at me. As she was being thrown out, she tossed a very heavy mug at my head. It hit me. FML
Today, I sneezed so bad in public that I dropped my coffee, kicked it while trying to catch it, and watched it slide dramatically across the floor into someone’s shoe. They gasped like I'd committed a crime. I just whispered, “Sorry” and fled. FML
Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML
Today, I was at a coffee shop, trying to get to know the cute new barista. I wanted to compliment his nice eyes, but I got nervous and blurted out, "You have nice elbows!" He stared at me, confused, as I quickly grabbed my coffee and left. Now I can't even imagine going back there. FML
Today, I set my cup of coffee down on the stall floor to take care of my business. A hand reached under the stall door and took my coffee. I yelled to give it back, calling them obscene names. Moments later, my fresh coffee came flying over the door. I'm burned from my head to my legs. FML
Today, I was drinking from a water fountain. I bent over to sip the water and felt a HUGE slap on my ass. Completely confused, I turn around to see some guy with a horrified look on his face. Apparently he thought I was his girlfriend. Then I saw his girlfriend standing behind him, giving me the evil eye. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Redoxx_fml 22
What. The. ****?
rhaemese 9
That, is disgusting.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (114)
lelo007 11
There is a simple solution to this, have her fired before she can contaminate anybody else's drink or food! This is simply appalling! If I were you, I'd have management called before I even spoke to the employee personally.
coletrain11 5
Act like you've never picked a wedgie at work. Silly girl.
noelykins1 19
Picking a wedgie either way isn't even disgusting or a violation of health code. She has a wedgie she can use her hands against her clothes to pinch it out not disgusting or rude.
lelo007 11
Haha if I have that issue at work, I simply go to the bathroom.. Where there is a sink I wash my hands in afterwards. I don't do it in front of customers, even though I don't work with food or drink, it's still gross and downright rude.
whitey53 5
Complain to her manager, that's ******* disgusting.
xx000o 27
I would loudly demand a manager.
Skinwalker131 5
Visually Molesting? That's a new one...
christyxbee 15
I know right? What does that even mean?
rcgirl2 11
What the hell is wrong with people nowadays?
pinkredneck30 2
No common sense, no respect, and expect everything for absolutely nothing! That's what's wrong! And all this is making the rare and few good people left convert to the dark side! People suck!
Bjuddstr 4
Stevie Wonder would kick some ass. "visually raping"...
Bjuddstr 4
Ahem (molesting)
redreynard 14
What's she complaining about? Visual molesting provides incentive to tip.
skullofdarkness 18
I don't think she deserves one. She's just nasty.
redreynard 14
I'm with ya there. But I'll assume she was hoping for more positive feedback after being observed.
olpally 33
I've heard of sexual harassment before and all that stuff, but "visually molesting?" that's crazy talk, lol.
jessica051085 5
um, #24, your profile pic is "visually molesting" me. f'in pervert...
SqueakyChipmunk 22
I like to visually molest food. God, I'm a pervert.
BubbleGrunge 18
You may have visually molested her, but she physically ****** your coffee.
Bekll 31
OP's name suggests he's gay. I don't believe even straight men can "visually molest" women. She was just being a bitch.
retrorewind 13
yea i heard of this visually molesting stuff.... punishment in some countries is they poke an eye out and skull f*ck ya. hehe