Today, I went to an auction for the first time. When the run-down house I wanted to bid for came up, I opened bidding at £12,000 and surprisingly won. Feeling pleased, I turned to the person next to me and said, "Lucky me!" She replied, "Yes, lucky you!" and then under her breath said, "Cockhead". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was playing at a bingo hall, when I got a bingo for $50. I got so excited that I accidentally yelled, "Holy fuck!" They kicked me out. I didn't get the money. FML
Today, after saving for years, I was finally ready to buy a home. I found a decent place. I put in an offer. A hedge fund bought it 7 minutes later, for cash. FML
Today, I volunteered to be Auctioned off for Charity. I went for $3. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend jumping on my bed exclaiming that he had "won the lottery." He broke the bed. Turns out he only won £15.80. FML
Today, I got really excited at work over a deal I was about to close. I got up and started performing a rather obscene hip thrust only to notice a client sitting in the glass meeting room. FML
Today, I won a raffle organised by a friend. I discovered one of the "prizes" was actually a present that I had given to her, that she had "loved". When I asked her where she had gotten it, she said, "Oh, just some crap someone gave me once." She didn't even remember that I had given it to her. FML
Today, I bought a home at a bargain. It will need 5 grand in repairs to fix plumbing and electric, but it's mine. When I pulled up the listing to show pictures to my friends, there was a new listing that was in the same neighborhood, and a larger, nicer house that is move in ready. Same price. FML
Today, I won a big raffle. However, my name is so ridiculous-sounding that they thought someone was playing a prank, and pulled a different ticket. I was too embarrassed to say anything. FML
Today, I scratched a lottery ticket I had gotten for my birthday and won $10,000. In celebration, I jumped up and raised my hands directly into a ceiling fan. Oh, and it was a fake ticket. FML
Today, I bought my first house, blowing nearly all my savings on the deposit. I had left myself enough for just a couple of necessary bits of furniture. It turns out the previous owner completely stripped the house when he left, taking the oven and even the toilet with him, amongst other things. FML
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Top comments
bluucat 17
She's just jealous.
afkwarrior 25
Wow. Tell her to go bid on some manners.
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Comments (114)
0h_Boy 26
I guess we all know who won't be getting invited over for tea
melacortez 11
Well that's random, but congrats on your new house
The_Big_Boss 20
Oh no, you were called a cockhead. How will you ever get over this?!
Headcrab 29
good luck! An absurdly low price BTW. Is it a real house? Here in Belgium you can't even buy a garage forthat money. Maybe enough 'land' to build a garage on.
Nilorak 24
Nah it was a Barbie house.
DaMann360 19
Big ass Barbie house for that price
bummervacation 10
But.. What if your head actually looks like a **** and you've never ever noticed? Maybe she was just being observant :)
the0ddest0ne 5
That would be interesting. Someone with a head shaped like a ****, how likely do you think that would that be?
bummervacation 10
I'll just say this: some people should never go bald
the0ddest0ne 5
Well, were you a cockhead? Kidding, I'm sure you're not. It's okay though, you won a house for a really low price, you should be celebrating, it's not like she's someone you care about. In simple, short terms: you won something, she needs to learn manners, but you still shouldn't care what she says while she's being a sore loser.
Simbaby 23
She's bound to be jealous that you won and she didn't .
Nilorak 24
Being jelous doesn't justify being a cockhead.
gunnerblaster 21
If no one else counter-bid, it makes you wonder if perhaps you should've bid less...
ftloosenfanzfree 7
I think auctions usually start at a set price. Like the auctioneer would say "let's start the bidding at 12,000! who will bid 12,000?" But my full auction experience comes from television so maybe that isn't the case here.
lexa1love 16
Usually if no one takes the opening bid they will lower it. Unless it was to be sold at a minimum set price.
trulypar 34
I guess OP could have said, "well, now I know one person not to rent to", and walk away.
Dave_Davington 35
Some stranger called you a cockhead. Seems rather insignificant, since you just got a house for so cheap.
SiJSyd 2
Again... OP never said that the winning bid was 12k.