By xtinasky1 - 07/03/2014 04:24 - United States - Spanaway

Today, after waking up, I walk into the kitchen to see my two-year-old with a blue sharpie in hand as he says, "Look mom, color!" He left no appliance or cabinet untouched in his coloring masterpiece, and I'm still trying to figure out where he got the sharpie from. FML
I agree, your life sucks 42 047
You deserved it 5 464

xtinasky1 tells us more.

Apparently mommy can't go to the bathroom, because that's where I was for a whole 2 minutes while he did it.

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Only thing worse than an unsupervised two year old is two unsupervised two year olds.

shyeahh_fml 19

A common practice is using the restroom almost immediately after waking up. Being a parent doesn't exempt an individual from this.


beautybabexo 7

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Am l the only one who doesn't find this "hilarious"?

Wait till you're in this situation, #1, and we'll ask you again if it's still "hilarious"...

Apparently, this isn't a humor site anymore. So what is this? A drama? A tragedy?

My nephew did this to his dad's arm and couch a few days ago with a pen. Like him, you should be up at the same time of your child, or at least keep him somewhere where he can't do too much damage

Until you have a toddler. That isn't always easy.

Maybe I have a sense of humor, because I def thought this was twins did the same thing only in bright pink..we laughed about it, bought a magic mr.clean eraser and started waking up 30 minutes earlier so we could beat them to the mischief

asnakelovinbabe 16

It is funny in how innocent and sincere two year olds are, but not that funny that the parent woke up to this, implying that their kid was roaming free around the house before they were awake. I don't understand why anyone would let that happen? If my two year old wakes up she can't get out of her (two year old-proofed) room until I let her out of it, for her safety. For her to be able to roam the house unsupervised if she just felt like quietly waking up and rolling out of bed in the wee hours of the morning... That would be... Madness. No way, no madness in this house. This is not Sparta.

fksfsdhfsdfh 26

Look mom, downvotes!

So yeah, asnakelovinggirl. Your 2-year old can´t get out of the 2-year old-proof room, without you, letting the child out. What if there is a fire at night, that renders you unconcius from smoke, you just let the kid be trapped in a room, with no means of getting out.....

Only thing worse than an unsupervised two year old is two unsupervised two year olds.

Or an unsupervised two year old armed with a sharpie.

With sharpies Shit 14 you beat me to it

Been there, done that. My twin brother and I were two at one point, my mom had to have us on leashes in public places to avoid us destroying everything in sight.

I have two year old twins. I laughed at this, and then cried a little. Then my two year olds destroyed something.

ArianaLuvU 14

Same with me and my sister!

Magic eraser works wonders. My little siblings just adored seeing marks on everything and the eraser did the trick and cleared it up.

At least you're not feeling blue about it, OP!

XxXBadAshXxX 27

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I don't want to know how you discipline your children.

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You have awful parents..

4, you mean a baby pen, like one of those plastic fences to keep a baby in? A baby pin sounds mean...

DrownedMyFish 18

I think she means baby pens* or a play pen, the thing you put your children so they can play around but still be in a secure place....... I hope that's what she actually meant to say.

Maybe she meant a baby pen, yes. But #20 was serious about actual pins...

what a poor girl。。。

LeaAnne94 17

I hope that's just a bad joke. :S

This is going to be a great Remember-when-you-did-story on his wedding sometime! Not that that is of interest for you at this time...

AHH the terrible two's- when I was his age I gave myself a hair cut. Needless to say my bangs were nonexistent.

When i was like 4, i gave my younger brother a haircut... With safety scissors which can cut hair but not paper.

CaitiieBuggs 23

When I was 3 I locked myself in the bathroom and gave myself a hair cut. It looked a lot like Carol Brady's from The Brady Bunch. My mom said it was surprising even.

the great thing about two year olds is no matter where you hide the pens/crayons or paint, they will always find them and cause chaos :)

DaMann360 19

I don't know where you are...but I will find you...and I will use you to draw pretty pictures on Mommy's kitchen.

At least it wasn't like that FML that had the kid do almost the same thing except with his poop

Poop doesn't stain like sharpies

Amanyyyyyy 29

I'd rather put in the extra work to clean sharpie off my kitchen than poop.

62. No, but it smell like shit.

Do you have the next Picasso on your hands?

In case he's not, a Mr. Clean magic eraser works wonders:D

my walls look like the revolution of cave painting. Kids always find the sharpees too.

That's why acetone or gasoline work wonders for removing sharpee.

You mean they should light the house in fire and buy a new one? Sounds a little extreme

Magic erasers works wonders.

those take the paint off my walls too :/

CaitiieBuggs 23

Hairspray helps with removing permanent pens. And depending on the surface, covering it with dry erase marker will make it easy to wipe away.

@46, no, gasoline and acetone are good at dissolving the ink in sharpies, though it's more flammable and leaves the surface reeking of gasoline for a while.

106, I'm 99.99% sure 46 was just joking.