Today, I went out for a smoke before dinner. I glanced through the window only to see my husband take my cooking scissors, cut his toe nails and then put them back in the utensils canister without washing them. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML
Today, I walked into my bedroom to find my boyfriend clipping his toe nails into my pillow case. FML
Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles tin to play with on the floor. I saw some crumbs at the bottom, so I emptied the can in my mouth before I gave it to her. I crunched hard and spat them out, realizing my boyfriend had just cut his toenails into the can. FML
Today, my husband stabbed me with his unusually long, nasty toenails in the leg while he slept. It took 3 stitches to fix it up, my husband and doctor laughed the entire time. He still refuses to cut them. FML
Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my father trimming his pubes over the bin with our kitchen scissors. FML
Today, I witnessed my husband hocking a loogie into his hand, then throwing it into the trash can and continuing to make our sandwiches. FML
Today, I noticed that the floor outside our bathroom was covered in toenail clippings. I asked my husband what had happened. Turns out, he saves time by clipping his nails onto the floor and then sweeping them out into the hall, where they get lodged in the carpet. FML
Today, I was chopping veggies for dinner and accidentally sliced through my thumbnail and into my finger. I wrapped it and finished cooking, despite being in considerable pain. My husband patted my shoulder and said sympathetically, "Don’t worry about the dishes babe. You can just do them tomorrow.” FML
Today, I was helping tidy up after my girlfriend's flat warming. I went to put a sharp kitchen knife in the sink while she was washing dishes, and stabbed her in the finger instead. FML
Today, less than a week after moving in together, I decided to clean out my husband's messy room. In the process, I found a jar containing what appears to be a toenail collection. I don't think I'll ever regain my appetite. FML
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Top comments
darienlake 0
hahaha. you should have gone back in and started a conversation while casually using the scissors to cut your pubic hairs and see what he does
RipIt 0
YDI for smoking! naaah just kidding, that's gross!
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Comments (235)
yusaku02 20
YDI for smoking
slatter 1
tbh I would be just as sickened if sumone smoked just before making dinner
cmac86 24
that's why I don't eat French food.
sulhaq 4
How much does everyone want to bet that every single comment on here would be something to the effect of "Ewww!!! That's disgusting! Tell him to stop or dump him!" if the OP hadn't mentioned cigarettes. But just because she mentioned something that the society wants you to think of as Satan, no one gives a shit about the husband. Oh how easily we are manipulated.
Panther_fml 0
Thanks Captain Obvious!!! And nobody really gives a shit about your long ass comment.
sulhaq 4
The fact that you replied to my comment is in direct contradiction to what you just said. Idiot.
alexliao1995 0
thats yet anither reason why you shouldnt smoke
kingtut95 0
it ******* serves you right for smoking
fububc 0
#178. a simple "quit smoking" comment would be nice
Pissed_Off_ 0
The fact that the OP had not known about her husbands activity is what makes her story so disturbing. She had been, in essence, cutting various foods (not just meats that are cooked to a proper temp) and serving them to herself and perhaps her family as well. And as for the smoking? That was hardly the point of this woman's FML. Smoking may not be beautiful, but it's an addiction that is extremely difficult to quit. You don't get to rag on others' addictions if you've never been there yourself. When did the world get so close minded? If you have nothing better to do than to berate this woman for smoking, which is something all smokers already feel shame for, than you have never been in this woman's shoes, and are probably very young and potentially very naive.
Pissed_Off_ 0
The fact that the OP had not known about her husbands activity is what makes her story so disturbing. She had been, in essence, cutting various foods (not just meats that are cooked to a proper temp) and serving them to herself and perhaps her family as well. And as for the smoking? That was hardly the point of this woman's FML. Smoking may not be beautiful, but it's an addiction that is extremely difficult to quit. You don't get to rag on others' addictions if you've never been there yourself. When did the world get so close minded? If you have nothing better to do than to berate this woman for smoking, which is something all smokers already feel shame for, than you have never been in this woman's shoes, and are probably very young and potentially very naive.
Panther_fml 0
YDI for Smoking.
Comentator 0
We are men...scissors are scissors. They cut things, end of story.
Comentator 0
I agree 100% with you. Change it to I went to take a huge dump and I noticed my husband doing it...WTF does her smoking have any thing to do with what her husband did.
fububc 0
#184. I know, thanks for the support
blastvortex 4
Wow! This is the first time I've ever heard of a man that did something that gross! It's utterly unbelievable! Pinch me! I must be dreaming! [le sigh...]