Today, I went into the bathroom and got angry upon finding that once again, no one had bothered to put on a new roll of toilet paper. And then I remembered that I live alone. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. Right as I sat down and started taking a dump, I looked over at the empty toilet paper roll and remembered his roommate had told us the night before that they were out of toilet paper. FML
Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find no toilet paper and a piece of shitty wallpaper in the bowl. FML
Today, I knocked on the door of the bathroom to make sure nobody was in there before I walked in. Then I remembered I live alone. FML
Today, I was moving into my new apartment. I moved in a couple of bags and realized I really needed to poop. It’s been 10 minutes since I realized I hadn’t brought the toilet paper in yet. No one to bring me any. FML
Today, I went to the restroom at school and when I finished my business, I noticed there was no toilet paper. I then began to wait, hoping that a janitor would come by with extra toilet paper. It wasn't until an hour later that I then realized there was four extra rolls hidden behind the toilet. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom taking a poop and as I started unrolling the toilet paper, the whole roll fell off the handle and rolled out underneath the cubicle door. I heard somebody laugh at me. Nobody helped. FML
Today, the stall I was using didn't have any toilet paper in it. Being the immature idiot I am, I was too embarrassed to ask for someone to grab me some. So I waited 45 minutes for the bathroom to be empty and crept into the next stall, only to find it was also out of toilet paper. FML
Today, while I was in a bathroom stall, the guy next to me asked me for toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML
Today, I was in a public bathroom with the runs when I noticed my stall didn't have any toilet paper. I was the only one in the bathroom, and I thought I could make it to the stall next to me and grab some with my pants down. I wasn't actually the only one in there. FML
Today, in desperate need of a shit, I quickly ran into a shop to buy toilet paper. I rushed home and unleashed, only to realise I'd bought paper towels. Without options, I had to wipe my ass with them and consequently blocked the toilet. I found rolls of toilet paper while looking for the plunger. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Ipeh 20
You're being an asshole to your asshole, OP. YDI.
feven 32
Again? How often does this need to happen for you to remember you live alone haha.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (39)
Beeboopbeep 9
This made me laugh way harder than it should have.
zaidthunder1 27
No Bidets in the US? Those spray guns work better than toilet paper especially for cleaning the asshole. Only negative is a bit of excessive water consumption.
zaidthunder1 27
I really do understand OPs condition. I live alone and my TV Remotes are out of battery since a month. Im too lazy to remember to buy them or walk out to the store and get them.
karmaweasel 14
******* lazy cats.
cheshireau 26
How does one forget they live alone?
brenton490 19
Watch out op next thing you know your breaking forth walls and getting tricked to a cure for cancer. Then you become a anti hero looking for Francis.
lifegavemelemonz 4
You're so intelligent
Nbonus3104 6
This made me chuckle. ?
billy194 6
Do you think there might be squatters in your place while you are away?