Intimacy: Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards,... - FML

By Anonymous - 11/12/2011 11:54 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 311

You deserved it 8 658

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Same thing different taste

By JoshuasGirl - 23/12/2013 19:13 - United States - Grand Rapids

Spicy

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 125

You deserved it 6 462

It's sus

By Anonymous - 04/01/2011 09:01 - New Zealand

Spicy

Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 176

You deserved it 10 372

Heartless swine

By Anonymous - 15/09/2015 05:56 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, I got up to get some water. When I stood up, I fell straight to the ground, my legs were so weak. As I fell, I hit my head on the end table and knocked myself unconscious. My boyfriend laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 046

You deserved it 4 396

Fond memories

By -_- - 13/08/2011 00:05 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 897

You deserved it 4 649

By Darcy - 26/10/2011 06:58 - Australia

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 606

You deserved it 4 588

By disapointed girl - 28/12/2009 16:58 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 050

You deserved it 5 907

By anonymous - 01/02/2009 10:53 - United States

Spicy

Today, I slept with this new guy for the first time. After sex, he said the doggie style position was fun, it made him wonder what it would be like to rape a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 240

You deserved it 6 329

The Great Pretender

By CJune24 - 22/10/2014 21:24 - United Kingdom - Huddersfield

Spicy

Today, I tried to seduce my boyfriend so I mounted him and began kissing him. He immediately pretended to snore into my mouth and rolled over, making me fall off of the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 554

You deserved it 5 460

No gods, no masters

By anon - 31/07/2015 20:28 - United States - San Francisco

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 403

You deserved it 34 780

Nomnom

By wow babe - 19/11/2012 17:46 - United States - Arnold

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 115

You deserved it 5 631

Next

Top comments

nixter5 18

Sunday 11 December 2011 19:09

Please don't tell me you used teeth.

clownphobia23 12

Sunday 11 December 2011 19:10

...What the heck?

Comments

VoteForTaco 8

Sunday 11 December 2011 23:27

Fetal position?

Slinkydalatg 6

Sunday 11 December 2011 23:31

You must give one helluva *******...

MrWhiteGluz 1

Sunday 11 December 2011 23:41

Maybe he was sleeping

scorpio1194 0

Sunday 11 December 2011 23:45

Wtf??

imabeastmofukka 5

Sunday 11 December 2011 23:49

Lucky boyfriend!!!!!

hewro_failure 11

Sunday 11 December 2011 23:50

That's sad I would find someone who isn't strange after sex or anything sexual

juturnaamo 29

Monday 12 December 2011 1:16

A lot of people are strange after sex. My BF laughs uncontrollably. Some people cry. I get super cuddly.

Calyx_fml 21

Sunday 11 December 2011 23:57

It sounds like he was sexually abused at some point.

apkiys 0

Monday 12 December 2011 0:09

OP, which head did you stroke for an hour?!

ellietheginger 0

Monday 12 December 2011 0:12

Im so confused..

Humanspider 18

Monday 12 December 2011 0:13

FHL

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