Today, I was working and eating. I was so tired that I bit into my pen and smeared my chocolate-filled pastry on my exercise book. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I smashed a spider with my pencil eraser. Later, I absentmindedly chewed on it while doing my homework. FML
Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML
Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML
Today, I was sitting at the computer when this really annoying fly kept landing on the keyboard. After a while, I took the bottom of a pen and squished it. Twenty minutes later I absentmindedly started chewing at the bottom of the pen. FML
Today, I was in an exam and was chewing the end of my pen, stuck on a question. My mouth filled up with ink. I wasn't allowed to leave, so I had to sit for another hour with a foul-tasting blue tongue and a half-working pen. FML
Today, I was being playful with my boyfriend and put a chocolate between my legs. He bit the chocolate. My lips too... FML
Today, my boss ate a small piece of paper off her desk, thinking it was frosting. I have to work for this woman. FML
Today, in an attempt to eat healthier snacks, I took an apple to work. I ate it after lunch. Now my teeth are full of bits of apple and I can't focus on my work because it's distracting. Three hours until I can get home and floss. FML
Today, I found ants all over my chocolate, but I'm so addicted that I just wiped them off and ate it anyway. FML
Today, I was running late for work and skipped breakfast. At a red light, I noticed a granola bar in my bag and so I took a bite, only to realize it was actually a dog treat I'd stuffed in there days ago. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
fackit 0
exercise and chocolate pastries do not go well together
whitey_fml 0
and how does one "crunch a pen", exactly?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (23)
Elenachka 0
WTF does this even mean
winniebabi 0
After reading #9 & #10 I actually understand what OP was even talking about -- Thanks y'all. And BTW; am I the only one who thinks this is stupid and not FML worthy?
hulabird 0
excercise book=text book, not necessarily about excercise. working=doing work, not working out. and also? eating pastry isnt a habit that only applies to overweight people.
Synistiel 14
Maybe they were reading a book about exercise and doing work. Who knows.
rosha267 21
Ugh so if I'm not eating fatty desserts filled with empty calories it means I'm starving myself to be disgustingly skinny? The other day I was eating a yogurt and chicken salad for lunch at work and everyone asked why i was on such an "insane diet" when I'm already skinny! You keep your chocolate filled doughnuts and huge waistline and i'll keep my chicken salad
Synistiel 14
Jesus Christ. You miss, need to understand something about desserts. As long as you work out, you can eat whatever you want. You would just burn the "empty calories".
zebrapattern 6
were you still sleeping when you wrote this? because it makes no sense.
thefmlman2011 37
*sighs* pan au chocolate.... one of my fave French pastry.