By Anonymous - 21/12/2011 18:06 - United States

Today, I was woken up early in the morning by the sound of my mother frantically crying out for help. Apparently she had tried, unsuccessfully, to "end the suffering" of an injured squirrel by drowning it in the toilet. How? By placing it into the bowl and smothering it with clothes. My clothes. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 202
You deserved it 2 609

Same thing different taste


Chaos187 6

Yeah if anything her heart was in the right place

Kenik 6

I think the mother might have a slight case of insanity.

I think the mother might have a small case of Squaids.

#1 Yeah atleast she tried to kill a squirrel to end it's pain by drowning it because I'm sure that's fun, being drowned to death, and she failed ontop of that. God knows what they did to it afterwards. The squirrel probably just had a limp or something.

Yeah, drowning a squirrel is DEFINITELY gonna kill it quick and painlessly... She's demented. It's more of a "FML" for the squirrel..

"Today, I broke my leg. A crazy woman decided to end my pain by shoving me in her toilet & smothering me with clothes. FML"

Shindib 2

lol you gotta understand.. it was dying and my mother does not know how to handle this situation with any normal amount of rational thought.. she tried to do what was best.. what she should have done was called someone that actually knew what to do.. lol

today I was going about my business collecting nuts since I'm a squirrel and all, when I stubbed my toe on a branch then some crazy lady tried to drown me in her own urine. FML

1- that's what your dad said when your mom tried not to get pregnant with you. Okay that was unnecessary but a sudden evil urge came over me *evil laugh*

dcg1375 7

Are you kidding me??? This actually happened?? Can you say "RED NECK"!!! This is one of the most effed up FMLs I have read! Wow.

monkeysareyummy 0

Hope they weren't nice clothes.. If they were ratty old clothes then it might not be as bad. But still that sucks.

Clearly drowning is the QUICKEST and EASIEST way to kill an injured animal...obviously *rolls eyes and sighs*.

She was taken revenge because you died her hair orange.

I don't see how the squirrel would help..but okay...

Today, while enjoying my day full of nuts, some crazy bitch tried to drown me in her toilet. FML Poor squirrel!

laurbear12 3

194, did you ride the short bus?

Would be a shame if anything were to happen to her..

Why, mom? Couldn't you just have burned my clothes instead? toilet water and squirrel blood...yeah, that's exactly what the washing instructions say on my $80 jeans.

194- seriously?! OP's mom is trying to drown the damn squirrel! DUH

I'm sorry but that made me laugh. Most inventive way to kill EVER. But sorry about your clothes!

15- Theisland and perdix are the first two people who would come up with that type of torture for squirrels..

159- do you take that broomstick and make squirrel shiskabobs?

and they're coming to take me away, hahaaaa! to the funny farm, where life is beautiful all the time... am I the only one that knows that song...?

PandasEatYou 5

And I'll be happy to see those nice young man in their clean white coats Lol no it's an awesome song by Napoleon XIV

yes! 213 has my back. I knew there had to be SOMEONE out there. thanks 213 :)

I don't know it well enough to quote it, but y'all aren't alone out there. Ha ha! Ho ho!

178- oh shit I'm gonna find this song now!!

Well... I suggest you get your mom something more productive to do.

No. Homes don't take care of your loved ones, if anything they abuse them.

O.o you're making jokes when in fact it is not funny, when you're at that age where your children want to put you in a home, and you go and they abuse you. Remember this day. Js I will never put my mother or any other loved one in a home.

Nice broad statement there 57. I'd like to see where you collected your evidence that shows ALL nursing homes abuse people.

I love watching idiots get owned. It gives me a strange feeling of satisfaction.

hotPinklipstick 24

57- There are 3 people in my family that work in a nursing home and they have never abused the patients there. They go out of their way to provide the best care for them. Most of the injuries are cause by the patients themselves. The patients may forget though due to dementia and Alzheimer's, and they blame it on the nurses/doctors. So before you go around talking crap about the care nursing homes provide actually find legit evidence and not rumors or falsified statements.

No matter how good the service the nursing home is, i feel like that isnt much of an existance. When and if i reach the age that i need to be taken care of is when i roll into a mall with a bomb stapped to my wheelchair. Because thats the way to go out.

Homes are only good to get rid of unwanted trash. My mother will live with me, and my father will be in a home and have no visitors.

223, That is the stupidest shit I've ever heard. Some people are not able to be around 24/7 to keep an eye on their parents/grandparents and ensure they are safe, ESPECIALLY those with serious conditions. You may have a job where you work from home, most of us don't, so don't insult people who simply don't have the resources to care for people and survive at the same time. Dipshit.

keven501 12

Is that how you suggest ending the life of a goldfish? Drowning it?

it is possible to drown a fish, just thought I'd let you know, if you put a fish in a tank which is too small and don't change the water often enough it uses all the oxygen in the water and drowns (awaiting down votes)

94yhy 8

You would be suffocating the fish, not drowning it.

SpruceDread4578 13

It's like throwing a bird off a cliff.

Sinamoi 18

94- it's like burying Theisland in an oxygen tank!

Your all complete idiots idiots. He's making reference to the fact you flush dead or sick goldfish down the toilet, not that water can drown a fish. He's making a joke because she's trying to dispose of a squirrel in a similar way, but apparently most of you don't get it.

Shindib 2

Oh man this little shoot off of posts is excellent lmfao

No one is an idiot here. The only thing I see are a few people stating their opinions, and a jackass. I see the reference he was trying to make. But OP had said that her mother had tried to put the squirrel out of its misery by drowning it. Therefore, I don't really see how stating that it's not a goldfish fits in unless you are trying to drown the goldfish, to put it out of its misery. What I don't understand here is how it was so easy for you to catch on to keven501's reference, but so difficult for you to catch on to mine.

Marcella1016 31

Just as obvious as it was to you that 6 was joking, it was just as obvious to the rest of us that 18, and every comment after her, was also joking. The jokes appear to have been lost on you, however. If I were you, I would reevaluate who the actual "******* idiot" is.

DEVOLVED* I suggest that those of you who don't understand satire refrain from replying or voting.

152 - definitely humane as well, flushing SICK goldfish. I wonder if your parents did that to you as a kid "omg, he's got a cold, quick, flush him!"

169 - the fact that that I typed that on an iPhone makes "your" a insignificant error, it could have been much worse. And no, you can not drown a fish. Drowning requires lungs by definition. You can asphyxiate a fish, or deplete them of oxygen, but this is not drowning. Putting fish in fresh water or salt water is more like poisoning than drowning.

180 - Do you know what a quote is? Paraphrasing me and then putting it in quotations does not mean I said it.

And when I posted that the comment had -10 votes, so obviously people were not getting the joke.

169 - "salt water fish environment" Derp 239 - I am also on my phone, but I never misuse your/you're, were/we're/where, their/there, or other commonly misused homonyms. Phones aren't an excuse for laziness.

Drowning is one of the worst ways to die. Just shoot it in the head with a 12 gauge if you want to make it quick.

p3mguin 7

Chuck Norris is my baby. Learns from the best.

Lies. I'm my own father. ******* rumors these days.

1) i dont think jesus is sposed to cuss And B) save ammo use a .22

Actually no if you're a man you'll use a 10 or an 8 gauge. ******* blow it's head off. And no I'm allowed to swear whenever the **** I want, what am I going to punish myself? But YOU GUYS are not allowed.

MerrikBarbarian 9

If you blow it's head off though you don't get a nice skin to mount and sell on eBay though. Also makes skinning it for squirrel stew harder. ;p

slushpup9696 12

It boggles my mind that fully grown adults are still stupid enough to do this.

Boggle? Boggle Boggle? ... … … ... ... … Boogle?

At least you don't have to do laundry this week

Shitty clothes though i bet they smell like crap and wet squirrel