Intimacy: Today, I was sunbathing by my pool, totally naked. After a while...

By Money Shot - 15/07/2018 06:00

Today, I was sunbathing by my pool, totally naked. After a while I got a boner and decided to jerk off. As I was about to finish, I rolled over to cum on the deck, but when I rolled back, my elderly neighbor yelled, "Don't do that in the open if you won’t give up the money shot." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 318

You deserved it 9 171

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Baked

By NotHappyJan - 03/12/2018 03:00

Today, I thought I'd take advantage of the lovely weather and sunbake topless in my grandmother's back yard. My grandma went up the street to do some shopping and didn’t tell me that men were coming to mow the lawn. I was laying on my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 755

You deserved it 2 002

By today - 17/03/2010 06:12

Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 123

You deserved it 4 417

By Anonymous - 09/07/2013 16:07 - United States - Katy

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 742

You deserved it 23 092

By Thanks dicks - 07/09/2018 06:00

Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 757

You deserved it 379

By babyeaternomnom - 30/06/2012 16:22 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I caught my elderly neighbour skinny-dipping in my pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 887

You deserved it 2 326

By Anonymous - 02/09/2009 17:38 - United States

Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 183

You deserved it 17 632

By fucking hell my eyes burn - 23/05/2014 22:46 - Germany

Today, I woke up and stumbled over to my window to soak up some morning sunshine. The sunshine was lovely; the sight of my elderly neighbour doing some kind of nude yoga in his backyard certainly was not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 365

You deserved it 6 007

By PeepShow - 06/08/2009 06:04 - United States

Today, it was just too hot. I stripped down and, being home alone, pranced around nude, lip synching and playing air guitar to some music. I was getting really into when I opened my eyes and looked out the window to see an old man with binoculars on his terrace. He wasn't birdwatching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 276

You deserved it 47 094

By Sprinkles - 04/02/2015 07:44 - Australia

Today, I discovered my elderly neighbour likes to roam around his yard naked and wash his balls with the sprinkler. I'm never going to grab a snack in my kitchen again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 896

You deserved it 2 729

By ssjfml - 11/08/2015 14:56 - Denmark - Copenhagen

Today, while enjoying the nice weather in a park, I opened my eyes to the sight of some guy jacking off, half-hidden behind a tree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 295

You deserved it 2 000

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Thursday 5 July 2018 20:07

********** IN your house dude.

Eddie3 7

Thursday 5 July 2018 5:47

Who the hell just beats off in broad daylight?

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 34

Thursday 5 July 2018 2:21

At least you weren't doing it in the middle of a wedding photo shoot.

Eddie3 7

Thursday 5 July 2018 5:47

Who the hell just beats off in broad daylight?

ezrajab 22

Sunday 15 July 2018 18:49

That’s what I was thinking!

Lalala579121 27

Monday 16 July 2018 10:06

OP does.

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Thursday 5 July 2018 20:07

********** IN your house dude.

real life problems 26

Sunday 15 July 2018 6:03

This has YDI written all over it from start to finish.

Magtec 11

Sunday 15 July 2018 8:05

I see what you did there.

real life problems 26

Sunday 15 July 2018 13:56

It came in harder than usual, but the pun is there.

real life problems 26

Sunday 15 July 2018 13:59

It came in harder than usual but the pun is there.

Shabnam Moghal 14

Sunday 15 July 2018 15:36

You saw what OP did? Ohhh

Dave_Davington 33

Sunday 15 July 2018 6:37

You should listen to your elders. It is common courtesy, after all.

CalB22 6

Sunday 15 July 2018 6:42

Imagine how painful it would have been if you got a sunburn

Charlie Given 26

Sunday 15 July 2018 6:45

🤣🤣🤣I think grandma next door wanted a Pearl necklace stud muffin 😂😂😂😂

Magtec 11

Sunday 15 July 2018 8:06

you sure it wasn't grandpa?

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 15 July 2018 6:57

Make sure you edge a bit because old guys take longer to cum. Don’t short-change him with your show!

Davros 12

Sunday 15 July 2018 9:52

get your neighbor a tshirt that says Moneyshot.

geekynerd88 10

Sunday 15 July 2018 12:19

Bro, if you jack off in public not only is that illegal, but you may have some type of addiction!

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 15 July 2018 16:04

He said he was at HIS pool, so he didn’t jack off in public. Since he didn’t ensure that neighbors couldn’t watch him makes him a perverted exhibitionist.