Today, I was washing dishes when I picked up a plate and saw a huge spider. Trying to be nice, I took the plate outside and tried to gently push the spider off. The wind blew it into my eye. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML
Today, my cat ran outside. As I ran around the side of my house to get her, I felt a gigantic spiderweb land on my face. I also felt a light thud on my eye and it started to tear up. I ran inside and looked in a mirror, the spider was in my eye. FML
Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML
Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML
Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML
Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML
Today, with water in my eyes, I stepped out of the shower and rubbed my face with a towel. When I looked in the mirror, I realized there had been a giant spider on the towel. Its guts and legs were smeared all over my face. FML
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Top comments
nic7973 23
i hate spiders!
jideare 3
The wind? Pfft! Maybe it was a ninja spider that despise the outdoors.
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Comments (151)
Capt_Oblivious 10
Way to keep an eye on it.
br0ccoli 15
Hope you took out the eggs it laid
n_epic_fail 14
**** THAT! Ghetto stomp the shit outta it is what I would have done.
iheartprinceroyc 4
I dont like spiders at all they freak me out once I see one I literally stay in shock for a moment then i move to kill it
hellaflushfa5 6
I don't know why everyone is hatin on spiders. Personally I think they are dope. I'd rather have a spider eating pests rather then killing the spider and having a ******* poo covered fly landing on my food and buzzin around my face. **** the flies not spiders.
MickGold 8
Get lizards and amphibians. Fly AND spider problem solved!:D
SPAIDZ 0
Why is your house filled with flies?
hellaflushfa5 6
Just in general. Spiders are part of the solution.
youliia 0
Spiders are so disgusting! I feel bad for you.
pitman 0
That's the worse thing to happen EVER!!
MickGold 8
Omg, that really sucks! I'm an arachnophobe so if that happened to me I'd freak out! I really hope you don't have an irrational fear of spiders, cuz I know that would be HORRIBLE! FYL
Chilombian 0
*because
clm123455 14
59: you suck.
PandaSmile 24
Even though spiders are gross and creepy I hope this experience wont deter you from not killing them in the future :) Maybe just place it on the ground next time? Hope your eye is ok :)
peachesrmylife 0
Sucks