Today, I was walking through Macy's with my girlfriend. I stopped to admire a mannequin's ass, joking with my girlfriend like I was touching it. Then I slapped it. It wasn't a mannequin. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML
Today, my family and I went to the mall. We all split up in a department store to shop for our own clothes. While shopping, I caught my dad feeling up a mannequin in the back corner of the store. FML
Today, my family and I went to the mall. We all split up in a department store to shop for our own clothes. While shopping, I caught my dad feeling up a mannequin in the back corner of the store. FML
Today, I went into the store where my boyfriend works. I saw him talking to a customer, his back was facing me, so I went up and smacked his butt. Turns out it wasn't him. FML
Today, I was at my retail job and we had to change the mannequin's outfit. I had to hold her while my manager grabbed the new outfit. I rested my head on her naked plastic chest, and it was the closest I've got to affection in years. FML
Today, I mistook a mannequin in a store for a real person and apologized when I bumped into it. A staff member saw and said, "Don’t worry, he’s used to it." FML
Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my friend when I saw my boyfriend in Victoria's Secret - with another girl. They were joking and laughing, and I was really pissed off. So I stormed into the store and slapped him. He looked up at me with an angry and confused expression. It wasn't my boyfriend. FML
Today, I walked up to my friend and slapped her ass, because that’s what we always do. Turns out, it wasn’t my friend, it was a total stranger. FML
Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thank you, your FML was submitted, and will appear the moderation soon!
Top comments
dammn 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAH , smooth . did she slap you back ?
amirn86 0
How do you not realize that someone is alive LOL Ditto #1
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (258)
plum_lovin 28
That chick must have a nice bod to be mistaken for a mannequin...
pangdwang64 2
Fake
profligatesoul 18
YDI for smackin that ass. At least it wasn't a man
tlvv 12
Well this is the epitome of objectifying women.
fuckallyoupeople 4
Don't they use shoplifters as mannequins at Maceys (or is that a different store)
annakpok 7
This would be understandable, if you weren't in greggs
Zamboy 8
What did your girlfriend say?
Eanator777 2
How drunk were you
fantasyworld 37
What happened next?
gonnahurt 3
Go op... Tap dat ass!