By Foreveralone - United States - Hartford
Today, I was told I'm not invited to my best friend's birthday party. Apparently, being divorced and childless doesn't "mesh" well with the rest of the group. My parents are still watching her kids so she can go away for the weekend. FML
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  soullyfe  |  33

I wouldn't say her family deserves better. From the way it's worded by her saying they are 'still' watching her kids, seems to imply that they know about the situation, but are still doing the "best friend" a favor regardless.

  MissRaindrop  |  20

In the parents' defense, if they already made the commitment to watch her children then it'd be really petty to back out just because OP and her friend had a falling out. I understand sticking up for family but this isn't her parents' fight and they may not have known the full situation until OP was told. It'd be all fine and well for them to stop talking to her afterward but getting everyone involved and trying to make them break a prior commitment short notice is just rude and speaks volumes about the type of person who would do that. Spoiler: It's not good.


Blood is thicker than water. The friend had a nerve to not invite the OP for pretty hurtful reasons. The 'friend' could have just said nothing. who the hell tells people outright I'm having a party but you are not invited.

And since part of it has to do with the OP being childless, the fact it is babysitting the friends kids aka part the reason OP'S can't come to the party is reason enough to back out of the obligation. blood is thicker than water. Nobody wants to be divorced (at least no one would intend for it to happen upon getting married) And what if the OP wanted kids and it wasn't her choice to be childless. And even if so she has a right to be child free.

The parents need to stick up for their daughter. They committed to help a friend of their daughter's. All bets are off if they are suddenly not friend's. In all honesty they should be upset that the friend did this to their daughter right before they were doing her a huge favor.

the friend can ask the parents of one of new friends to watch her children. You stick up and fight for your family. Otherwise what is the point of having Family? I doubt people other than the friend would fail to understand why the parent's backed out. if anything it takes petty to know petty.

However... there is a tiny part of me that wonders what's so terrible about being divorced and childless that it would get someone not invited to a party. There's two sides to every story. Maybe the party literally revolve around children? or something. who knows?

  mermaidgirle  |  12

OP's parents babysitting while the "friend" goes out for the weekend implies no children will be at the party. Regardless of children present or not, it's a crappy and hurtful thing to do to a person. OP needs to have a heart to heart with this person, and maybe consider finding others who will value her friendship better.

  MissRaindrop  |  20

Gee, thanks. Try telling my "family" that blood is thicker than water. Not everyone holds on to that sentiment. The parents can dislike the friend and still be good enough people to stick to their commitments. There is absolutely no excuse to punish the children for the jerkishness of their mother. I am in no way defending her actions but commitment is commitment. Love is thicker than blood, my friend, and it's something this world is sorely lacking. I also believe that family is something you make, not who you're born to. My blood family is nothing but drug addicts, abusers, and pedophiles. You think I'd want to claim them and stick up for them after the life I had? The whole blood is thicker than water argument is archaic at best and designed to keep people in line who would otherwise abandon a toxic family environment. It's a classic technique abusers use for control.

By  frankmz  |  17

Hey OP. When you say best friend, is that best friend a sister of yours? Because that would explain your parents taking care of her kids. And you should enjoy being single. If you decide to go out, you don't have to worry about leaving any children with your parents. Or a baby sitter. Not saying children are bad. But you're the lucky one for being single and not "married with children."

  shadypalmtree  |  20

#12 that's what she's pointing out. There's absolutely no reason a friend's parents should be watching your kids while you're on vacation and you can't even invite their daughter to come with you. I don't care how close the two families are, that's just blatantly disrespectful of her "best friend".

By  heirofhope  |  38

Screw her. There is nothing wrong with being divorced or childless. Got out of a bad marriage? Good for you. Kid life isn't your cup of tea? Totally fine. I'm pretty sure that whole "doesn't mesh well" excuse is bs, as I think everyone there would love to hear about all the fun things you're doing without having to look after any kids. The only person it doesn't "mesh" well with is her. You can do better.