Miscellaneous: Today, I was the only sober person at a bonfire. After being...

By Alaska fire - 19/11/2016 22:14 - United States - Eagle River

Today, I was the only sober person at a bonfire. After being hit in the eye with a snowball, taking people's keys away because they were too wasted to drive, making sure no one died and stabbing the bottom of my foot with a nail, I got to sleep in the snow. Without any blankets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 221

You deserved it 1 101

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Same thing different taste

By good friend - 27/12/2013 06:35 - United States - Missoula

Today, my friends and I had our Christmas party. I ended up being the only one sober, and had to drive each and every person home. There were 15 of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 523

You deserved it 5 815

Gratitude

By fuckmylife - 28/04/2009 08:45 - United States

Today, I decided to be the sober housemate for the first time in a while. I drove my drunk friends to the bar and back, even buying them pizza before they passed out in the living room. I got repaid by catching my wasted housemate in my room, peeing all over my floor, bed, and nightstand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 351

You deserved it 8 365

By Anonymous - 25/08/2011 06:49 - United States

Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 134

You deserved it 3 486

By sma93 - 17/12/2016 18:30 - United States - Baldwin

Today, after my work's Christmas party, everyone got so drunk that I had to help one of my only sober co-workers take everyone home and clean up vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 714

You deserved it 585

Partaaaaay!

By Anonymous - 18/07/2013 18:16 - Canada - Kelowna

Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I'd set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 124

You deserved it 46 967

By Sebastian20 - 08/05/2013 11:05 - Netherlands - Groningen

Today, after a night of heavy drinking, I woke up handcuffed to my bed. My friends who are responsible for this think it's hilarious and claimed not to remember where they put the keys. They took pictures, then left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 324

You deserved it 15 609

Be prepared!

By Anonymous - 09/03/2024 10:00 - United States - Washington

Today, we had to abandon a Winter Scout camping trip midway because of a blizzard. I was hauling my stuff out of the cabin. No one warned me about the icy steps. I slipped, landed on my tailbone, blacked out and saw stars. Everyone is now laughing at me and doing impressions of me rolling in the snow in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 476

You deserved it 105

By Anonymous - 31/10/2015 12:36 - United States

Today, I went to a party with a friend. All I remember is passing out on the couch. About 10 minutes ago I was woken up by a bucket of cold water and thrown out by the guy who lives there. I'm still dripping and very cold, and I have no idea where the hell I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 649

You deserved it 8 439

Party hard

By Jason the flasher - 15/09/2018 22:00

Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 395

You deserved it 3 245

You played yourself

By anon - 25/03/2013 18:31 - United States

Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 115

You deserved it 68 651

Llyev 10

Sunday 20 November 2016 19:13

Wait what? I assume camping with tents and no one let you sleep in a car or tent at least? You need to get a tetanus shot for real. We're you the designated sober person? You seriously could've died of hypothermia, you need to have a little talk to a friend who was at that party or whatever cuz dat was messed up, if you didn't know anyone there maybe you shouldn't go to such shindigs like that again especially without someone who'd have your back and make sure u don't freeze.

Qandol 26

Sunday 20 November 2016 19:18

If they were friends at the bonfire. And if they were all drunk as you said, I'm sure you could of cuddle up with someone so you wouldn't be sleeping outside in the snow. After all you saved them all from getting hurt or die, at least they could of cuddle you:)

Comments

whatshuman43 8

Tuesday 22 November 2016 17:48

So if you were the only sober person and were not driving home, then ydi for not drinking yourself to sleep after

manuwish 9

Tuesday 22 November 2016 18:05

I don't understand why you couldn't sleep in one of the cars you had the keys to...

ESE_gutty 18

Wednesday 23 November 2016 18:29

Why didn't you just sleep in one of the so many cars that you had the keys of ?

interesting33 36

Sunday 27 November 2016 21:27

Wow. Thank you for taking the keys away.

fookmyleaf 13

Tuesday 13 December 2016 18:08

but did you die

shannon2348 14

Tuesday 7 January 2020 16:02

Oh poor you. And you being such a hero and everything saving everyone. And no where to sleep? How did you get there? A car? why couldn't you sleep in that? ydi