Intimacy: Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears....

By Anonymous - 18/05/2009 12:40 - United Kingdom

Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears. I had a cut on my ear close to the piercing and she thought that I had mistaken the cut for the opening, and said (as we walked past a car full of men), "Well of course it hurts when you put it in the wrong hole!". FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 041

You deserved it 8 432

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Same thing different taste

Looking good

By Kbizz - 03/06/2010 02:12 - Canada

Today, I was excited about showing everyone at work my new piercing. It's in an interesting place in my ear, and it's not that common. Before I had the chance to tell anyone about it, someone asked, "Are you wearing a hearing aid?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 571

You deserved it 32 388

By caempa - 29/12/2010 18:13 - Australia

Today, I was taking my earrings out and thought I had lost the back of one. Turns out my ear infection has caused the flesh of my ear to grow around and engulf the back of my earring and it is still stuck in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 843

You deserved it 13 639

By ouchouchouch - 28/03/2012 04:16 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I was adjusting my nose piercing from the inside. My mother saw and thought I was picking my nose, so she slapped my hand away, tearing my nose ring out in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 516

You deserved it 9 025

By lostbandana - 03/07/2011 02:15 - United States

Today, I was accused of cheating on my wife when an earring was found in our car. I knew it was my mom's missing earring but she didn't believe me. After calling my mom and getting them on the phone to clarify, my wife is upset I told my mother at all. Now I'm not a cheater, just an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 337

You deserved it 3 945

Piercing wit

By piercingfreak - 28/08/2011 10:41 - New Zealand

Today, I went in to see my piercer. He took one look at my piercing I got a few months ago and laughed saying "What a shit job, I'm sorry but that's pretty crappy because it's not even straight!" I then had to awkwardly explain it was indeed him who had pierced me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 868

You deserved it 4 112

By High school senior - 31/08/2017 23:15

Today, I spent the first day of my senior year in the ER because my new ear piercing got so infected that the doctors had to cut the earring out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 723

You deserved it 938

Ouch

By Anonymous - 24/05/2014 06:08 - United States

Today, I had a spur of the moment idea to go have my nose pierced. The piercer made sure to tell me how easily the little stud could get caught or hung up. I spent all day stressing over it only to scratch my nose and rip it out. Now I have a $40 bleeding hole in my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 837

You deserved it 37 043

By wowawesome - 18/07/2019 16:00

Today, I got a second piercing in my ear. I needed help cleaning the back, so I asked my dad for help. I told him to careful, but right when I did, he tore the earring out with the cotton swab. Thanks, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 513

You deserved it 360

By Pierced - 30/05/2017 18:00

Today, my mother accused me of getting another lip piercing done on the sly to spite her. She finally realised I have more than one and won't believe I've always had two. Thanks for noticing, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 105

You deserved it 429

By ouch - 24/07/2013 18:03 - United States - Sterling

Today, I spontaneously got my ear pierced. By spontaneously, I mean my 12-year-old sister stabbed one of her earrings into my ear while I was sleeping. She claimed the freckle on my earlobe looks "exactly the same" as the hole from her ear piercing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 339

You deserved it 3 313

rukusrazor 0

Monday 18 May 2009 20:21

Shes should know.

pancakelover 0

Monday 18 May 2009 20:22

WTF MOM!?!?! Moms always say shit at the wrong time...

Comments

stosborn 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 10:11

I hole (get it) heartedly agree with number 1,23, and 30

dyld921 2

Tuesday 19 May 2009 10:47

"Today, my mother made an euphemism about sex. FML"

eveningninja 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 14:04

Hahah.

spamme 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 15:33

there´s no wrong hole!

yarbitchyar 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 20:32

she "proceeded to say"? how about she just ******* said it!

happychappy 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 23:29

lol.. don't worry, u will probably never see those guys again

AskMeAnything 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 0:21

everyone look at my profile for advice! click my name

LaTuaCantante 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 2:07

ahahahahahaahahaha! if id heard that id be like 0,.,0 LOL! THATS WHAT SHE SAID =D

dinosaurs4sale 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 2:27

lmfao, that's funnyy...

itsgen 16

Wednesday 20 May 2009 7:55

eww im glad ive never had any conversation like that lol i hope she got what you really meant

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I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

Today, my boyfriend told me that in order for me to be considered for marriage, I need to prove that I can be a subservient woman. This includes signing over the deed to my house, my car, and all my banking assets, so that he can be “the man of the house.” I make 6 figures; he rents with roommates. FML

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You deserved it 153

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I agree, your life sucks 938

You deserved it 79

Today, my school is having homecoming. I'm taking a date who I really like, and she happens to have fairly large boobs. I have a friend who seems to think I have an obsession with boobs, so I texted her last night reading "btw, no big boob jokes tomorrow." I accidentally sent it to my date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 033

You deserved it 51 702

Today, I actually feel good about my decisions and my life. I've even started running to improve my health, and recover from self harming. My girlfriend is convinced I'm running to hurt myself, and won't let me near any health food or the treadmill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 85

Today, my boyfriend was tapping on my thigh to the beat of the music when we were driving to dinner. When I asked him what he was doing he replied, "Just watching the ripples." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 501

You deserved it 6 288

Today, after taking a guy home and getting frisky, he woke up in the middle of the night, got out of bed, and peed on my desk. That's 2 years of uni work and my laptop soaked through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 779

You deserved it 2 897

Today, I spent three hours cleaning my apartment for a date. I then took a nap, only to wake up to find my cat had destroyed the place. Lucky for me, my date never showed up, and I ended the evening drinking Prosecco while sadly swiping through Tinder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 867

You deserved it 137

Same thing different taste

Looking good

Piercing wit

Ouch

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