By anonymous - 14/03/2012 05:18 - Canada

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 042
You deserved it 14 161

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pinkcrayola 0

You're the one who picked him.

Best reason ever to dump the, pardon me please!, asshole!!!


that's disgusting , icky..

At least he feels comfortable with you!

That's a little too comfortable...

OP's gonna get pink eye. Seriously though, that's disgusting. I would have punched him in the balls.

In his boyish mind hes just telling you he loves you.

Can it compare to Steve-O's reaction when they gave it to him Jackass 2?

Damn, don't people know this is how you get pink eye? SMH -_-

You need to get a serious message through if you're marrying the guy. Really! Sitting on your face alone is bad enough!

gators1995 30

What can I say?? Adults are responsible and immature

Best reason ever to dump the, pardon me please!, asshole!!!

thiscrazything 1

Yeah, otherwise, good luck with a lifetime of bliss with that one.

mrmerino 0

Mein Gott, nobody cares if you swear in the Internet!

64: I think the "pardon me please" was for the possible pun in the word "asshole" since this fml is about farts. I could be wrong though.

I love it when people say mein gott xD

sezual 15

I'm not sure if that alone is enough reason to end an engagement, you did say 'yes' for a reason. Although, if the reasons you said yes don't outweigh this situation then you definitely have some thinking to do. It also bothers me when someone says 'and I'm marrying this man' and it's not implied as a good thing. Speak to him about it, I know it's hard to change habits but I'm sure farting in people's faces isn't a personal trait that he holds dear. If it is, run as fast as you can.

get him back for it!

pinkcrayola 0

You're the one who picked him.

TorturedXeno 27

Sounds like a kee... *gets punched in the face*

Seriously, is this an arranged marriage or something?

What an idiot.

There's always one...

What's with all the terrible first comments?

I'm not sure, but this is the 7th :)

firefighterjohn 9

I've done that to my girlfriend but she was tied up and couldn't do anything about it muuhahaha

And this, ladies, is why the man should be tied up instead of you :P

If my man were to do that to me I would really lose my cool. Vile!

MetalxSoldier 26

Wow, I bet all her friends are jealous! Not!

Hahaha god what an asshole

Colonel_Lexi 18

That must have been pretty embarASSing.

Your comment lacks quality.

shizzathon 5

Oh guys, lighten up, that's hilarious. What's a relationship without a bit of slagging and fun?

If sitting on your fiancé's face and violently farting is considered fun to you, then your chances of being with a girl is very slim.

*with anybody Childlike play is fun, but that's crossing the line...

Hilarious? I'm afraid we two have a complete different view on humor, pal. To be honest, I think this is more humiliating and disturbing and totally-not-acceptable-from-your-beloved-partner than hilarious.

But you come prepared. Gas Mask & all XD

RedPillSucks 31

DjeePee, was this your FML?

And that's why she has a gas mask at all times

Hahaha amen to you! It's hilarious :)

shizzathon 5

I'm a girl, actually, and have been in a blissful, committed, yet incredibly fun relationship for the past nine months. :)

peachesncreem 21

True love isn't just blind, it also has no sense of smell.

Andr913 13

Or hearing/taste.