Love: Today, I was showing my boyfriend some stuff I bought that day:...

By Anonymous - 02/09/2012 13:38 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I was showing my boyfriend some stuff I bought that day: a new thong and a bag of his favorite brand of peanuts. He was more excited about the peanuts. FML

agreeclassic 22 326

vote type 1 5 141

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Good one

By Anonymous - 16/12/2012 00:06 - United Kingdom - London

Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML

agreeclassic 30 330

vote type 1 4 394

By asdfghjkl_12 - 25/02/2009 04:33 - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend owns and wears more thongs than I do. FML

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By LinaLinaYeah - 09/12/2011 16:26 - Canada

Today, my mom gave me my boyfriend's boxers that she'd washed after finding them in my camping bag. The boxers had "Big Banana" written all over them, along with pictures of bananas. FML

agreeclassic 11 878

vote type 1 28 520

By Lilie - 17/12/2008 10:25 - France

Today, my boyfriend came round to drop off some underwear, which I'd left at his house. Not all of what he brought was mine. FML

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By "BunnysKitty" - 15/09/2017 23:15

Today, per my boyfriend's request, I bought some lingerie. He got so excited when he saw me, he ripped it off me right away. After we were done he used it to clean up. I essentially bought a $40 cum rag. FML

agreeclassic 5 087

vote type 1 910

Maybe he is gay!

By Anonymous - 27/12/2017 05:00

Today, my boyfriend got back from a long wrestling tournament. As a nice surprise, I decided to give him a little show over FaceTime. As soon as I stripped down into my bra and underwear, he paused the screen and started surfing the internet for new shoes. FML

agreeclassic 460

vote type 1 76

By tarynfaye - 21/12/2011 11:28 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I gave each other early Christmas gifts. I gave him a basketball signed by his favorite player, which took me forever to find. He got me diet pills. FML

agreeclassic 43 039

vote type 1 4 856

By Anonymous - 15/01/2013 00:21 - Canada - Corner Brook

Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret. He then added that his mother picked it out. FML

agreeclassic 33 601

vote type 1 3 439

That's so lovely!

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend texted me saying he had left a surprise on my driveway. Thinking it was something special, I went outside to look. It was a little bag of mayonnaise packets. FML

agreeclassic 28 430

vote type 1 4 052

By csgocockblock - 27/07/2016 17:26 - United States - Jenks

Today, when I got home from work I was pretty "in the mood" so I put on some cute undies and a tank top and went to get my boyfriends attention, he was so into his new computer game all I got was a half smile and a pat on the head. FML

agreeclassic 17 471

vote type 1 2 740

slick5880 22

Sunday 2 September 2012 19:54

There is a special bond between a man and his nuts.

flailingCheese 5

Sunday 2 September 2012 19:56

Make a thong of peanuts.

Comments

shotgun_girl 17

Monday 9 November 2015 5:10

Maybe he was hungry. Feed him and he will bee all fueled up and ready to go enjoy that thong on you!

Baron_Kaz 15

Tuesday 5 April 2016 23:04

That's what you get for dating an elephant!

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Why? Because I became a vegetarian. Apparently, he doesn't believe in "not eating meat." FML

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Today, I watched with mild confusion as a piece of paper tucked underneath my windshield wiper flapped around on the highway. What could it be? Surely not a parking ticket. Powerless, I watched it fly away. It must have been the insurance information for the person who swiped the back of my car. FML

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Today, I had a spur of the moment idea to go have my nose pierced. The piercer made sure to tell me how easily the little stud could get caught or hung up. I spent all day stressing over it only to scratch my nose and rip it out. Now I have a $40 bleeding hole in my nose. FML

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Today, my teacher reached over to hand me a paper. I thought it would be funny to flinch and say, "Dad, please don't hit me". Unfortunately, he didn't think it was a joke, so I got questioned by the on-campus officer. FML

agreeclassic 15 955

vote type 1 47 877

Today, I was told to put away the new toilet paper rolls. I reached in the package only for my hand to get wet, and then noticed the yellow liquid at the bottom. My cat used it as a litter box. At least, I hope it was my cat. FML

agreeclassic 3 508

vote type 1 396

Similar FMLs

Good one

Maybe he is gay!

That's so lovely!

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