Today, I was in the middle of enjoying a really good book while in a waiting room. Someone saw what I was reading and thought it would be cool if she leaned over and told me everything that happens. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML
Today, I saw a cute guy at the coffee shop reading a book. Wanting to be friendly, I smiled as I approached and asked what he was reading. He returned the smile and said, "Minding your damn business, by Fuck Off." FML
Today, I was in a public restroom when the girl in the stall next to me started asking me how I was doing. Thinking it was weird but not wanting to be rude, I answered her questions. Halfway though our conversation she said: "Hold on, the girl in the stall next to me thinks I'm talking to her." FML
Today, I went to the movies with my best friend. While waiting for it to start, I went on to describe this guy I really liked and how badly I wanted to do him. Just then the girl sitting behind us leans down and says "That's my little brother. So you're the creeper he talks about." FML
Today, my friend wasn't responding to my whispers in the library, so I walked over and very slightly moved his chair. At that exact moment, the librarian walked in. Regardless of our efforts to tell her anything, she got us banned from the library. FML
Today, I was at the cinema. There was a really tall woman in front of me and whenever I leaned to the right or left she would lean to the same side I do. Later, she started laughing. They guy next to her was telling her where I moved. FML
Today, I was in the romantic section of a book store making fun of the titles. Thinking my friend was behind me, I read in a sexy voice, “Sleeping with a Stranger” and turned to laugh only to find the 70-year-old store manager smiling and winking at me. FML
Today, I went to the library to bring back some books, I walked up to the counter and the librarian turned to me and said "What can I do for you young man?" I'm a girl. FML
Today, I gave the guy I've been seeing a copy of my newly published book, because I know he loves writing. He started reading and commented on how amazing it was. Then he gave it back. He didn't realize it was a gift. My awkward self didn't correct him. I'd written him a sweet letter inside. FML
Today, I pulled out a book and my bookmark fell out. My crush picked it up and a weird look came across his face. I then realized I had used toilet paper. Now I'm the girl who reads while taking dumps. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Lady: Looks like a good book. OP: It's awesome. It's so suspenseful... Lady: Oh, I've read that one. OP: Yeah,I haven't gotten to the end y... Lady: The cat puts Thing 1 and Thing 2 back in the box. OP: God DAMN it!
timtamslam 19
oh i hate that! sucks for you :(
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Comments (109)
DakotaCat 4
What a bitch! There is this guy in my film class that talks about the endings of the movies we are watching.
some1azn 0
Next time get an adult book. If she tells you the ending, that's when you should move seats......
josebeto 0
hmm.. she leaned over? If u got a good view I hope the book was long(;
basketballgirlrc 0
no offence but who cares?
i2smart2trick 15
I would then have cussed her ass out....possibly thrown the book at her too. lol
DocBastard 40
Lady: Looks like a good book. OP: It's awesome. It's so suspenseful... Lady: Oh, I've read that one. OP: Yeah,I haven't gotten to the end y... Lady: The cat puts Thing 1 and Thing 2 back in the box. OP: God DAMN it!
djmigues 7
Your comments almost always make me laugh.
RedPillSucks 33
Damnit DocBastard! I was about to read that one to my kid. Took 14 years, but we were almost at the end.... Way to crush our hopes and dreams... Next you'll be saying that the eggs really weren't painted green and that Dr. Seus is dead. What!?
redbluegreen 41
Would you go as far as call Doc a bastard? If you must know, RPS, Dr. Seuss isn't dead, he's just moved on to other things. You might be aware of his most recent and famous aliases: Albus Dumbledore and Lady GaGa.
RedPillSucks 33
Don't tell me what happens in the end. I don't wanna know if Dumbledore goes GaGa for the Lady.
RedPillSucks 33
whoops. comprehension fail on my part. Dr. Seus as Lady GaGa would explain the clothing made of roast beast.
W4X 0
That's like saying Dumbledore dies. Spoiling is funny! Jk, who is Dumblewhore anyways?
Zebidee 9
Was that last question specifically directed to Ms Rowling?
TheCheyenneMorga 3
Should have spit on the person, haha.
david172010 0
u shult stop him when he start..
oliver86 8
SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!