Today, I was helping an older lady return her previously bought items to customer service. As she walked away and said "Thanks," I tried to say "You're welcome" and "No problem" at the same time. I ended up saying "Your problem". She scowled at me. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, nine hours into a ten-hour shift, I accidentally told a customer, "You're a problem!" instead of, "You're welcome!" or, "No problem!" She gave me a dirty look and hurried off before I could correct myself. FML
Today, I helped a lady carry her grocery bags to her car. She was so grateful that she offered me a tip. I refused, but she insisted. When I finally took it, I looked at the bill to see she'd given me $1. I smiled and said thank you, but she looked at me like I’d just robbed her. FML
Today, a customer yelled at me so furiously that she sprayed my face with spittle. I had to stand there, smiling and politely explaining that I needed to see a receipt before I could give her a refund. When she finally gave up and left, my boss bitched me out for "provoking the customer". FML
Today, I was grocery shopping, when an elderly lady walked up to me and tripped over her own feet. I caught her by the arm, at which point she shrieked at me for "groping" her. She ended up smirking as security threw me out of the store. FML
Today, I tried to be helpful by holding the door open for a woman carrying boxes. She smiled and hurried toward me, then tripped and dropped everything at my feet. She stared at me like I'd caused it, and said, “Thanks” through clenched teeth. FML
Today, at the supermarket, an old lady asked for directions to the produce aisle. Having read way too many stories lately on this very site about awful elderly folks, I was wary, but helped her out. She gave me an awkward hug in thanks, lifting my wallet in the process, as I later found out. FML
Today, working in retail, I noticed a customer looking for an item, so I walked up to them and asked, "Is there something I can help you find?" He replied, "Did I ask for your fucking help?" FML
Today, I saw an elderly woman struggling to reach the top shelf in my local grocery store, so I went over and asked if she needed help. She then accused me of flirting with her and had me escorted from the property. FML
Today, I tried helping an old lady with her groceries. When I asked if she needed help she smiled. When I took one of her bags she yelled. I didn't know she was deaf. FML
Today, I had a lady come up to me in a store just to tell me how bad my acne was and what remedies I should use. I got so embarrassed, all I could say was, "OK" and, "Thank you" until she left me alone. FML
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Top comments
heyheyitskaykay 7
haha I hate it when I mess up my words like that!
perdix 31
The same thing happened to me except my jumbled words came out as, "I'm into cougars who own strap-ons" Awkward! Especially since she was carrying one in her purse. I had to explain it was a slip of the tongue which unleashed a whole new nightmare on me.
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Comments (60)
ROFLBERRYPIE 0
YDI for not thinking that was funny as hell.
lntreis_fml 0
Happens to me all the time when I speak french. The most commonly used words to say "Hi" in french are "salut" and "allo". When you mix up those two you end up with "salaud", which basically means "you jerk"! Its kinda embarrassing! :P
Arachnid 0
it's meeans bitch lol ...
airforcebound 0
**** the french
RedPillSucks 33
Brain fart FTW!!!
jamiee521 0
ahahaha!
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
You're dumb! sorry I meant to say either you're awesome or I'm dumb but I just combined the two accidentally.
CodingSquirrel 3
At least you didn't come out with "I have to go pee on her".
Nadinek98 0
scowl back dumbass. at least she didn't like wack u with a purse.:S:$
BabesYourAStar 0
you could of explained to her what you meant. not hard
perdix 31
The same thing happened to me except my jumbled words came out as, "I'm into cougars who own strap-ons" Awkward! Especially since she was carrying one in her purse. I had to explain it was a slip of the tongue which unleashed a whole new nightmare on me.
Matt_192 6
You, sir, win.
lovingmylife84 0
you're kind of a socially inept looser for not smiling and telling her "your welcome, it was no problem" as soon as you said it. that's your fault she scowled at you.
nerdsgetmehot 23
#28 Maybe OP is shy or was just too humiliated/surprised to think quickly on her feet and correct herself.
iluvme4never 0
#36 I agree with you, except, OP is a man.