Today, I was having sex with my new boyfriend, and I realized that he enjoys making airplane sound effects while inserting himself inside of me. Moment ruined. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML
Today, I heard my boyfriend making the same noises while cleaning out his ears as the ones he makes whenever we have sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML
Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
theneatoburrito 8
Well show him you enjoy making airplane sound effects as you leave the bedroom.
spike1994 2
You know what would really drive him wild? Shave a landing strip for him.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (116)
cpence98 4
Your NEW boyfriend
lorraineald 7
And when he comes he says, "Pew, pew, pew."
CharresBarkrey 16
That's so redundant. Why do people do that?!
FlyingPie 17
He was just cumming in for a landing.
DommeAshlee 11
Mine enjoys humming the imperial march... Could be worse...
AnimeCookie 9
I do that with my baby brother when I feed him soup.
Crzysht96 3
Just start singing ring around the rosie
buckdharma 38
Tell the new Captain that he never made it off the ground so you're switching back to autopilot.
fatlemonjefferso 8
Shave off the landing strip and he won't make those noises anymore!
JayFoShizzle 4
He's very..creative.