Today, I was dressing in my apartment when I noticed I left the blinds open. Outside, a maintenance man was mowing the grass within eyeshot. I figured I'd leave the blinds open and give him a little peek of the goods. Later I found a note on my window saying, 'Next time, close the blinds'. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I got home and noticed my kitchen light was on. I was annoyed because I'd definitely switched it off that morning. Then I noticed that I'd left the curtains open. The sun was shining directly through the window onto the wall. I'd spent five minutes investigating sunlight. FML
Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML
Today, I went to open my bedroom curtains while still in my pajamas, which, in my defense, were just a very oversized T-shirt. I didn’t realize the window cleaners were outside until I heard one of them say, “Morning!” We made prolonged eye contact before I slowly closed the curtains like I was lowering the lid on my own coffin. FML
Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML
Today, while masturbating at the computer, I was interrupted by a flash of light out of the corner of my eye. As I turned to face it, I realized I forgot to close the blinds. Standing at the window in the appartment across the street were two girls, one had a camera and was snapping a second shot. FML
Today, I left my apartment window open for some fresh air. When I returned, my idiot cat was on the balcony staring at me... from my neighbor’s apartment. FML
Today, I saw a woman in the neighbouring apartment taking a shower without pulling the blinds of her bathroom window. As a good Samaritan, I waved my arms to attract her attention that she forgot the blinds. She noticed me, opened the window, did a weird boob dance and middle fingered me. FML
Today, I moved into my new apartment. As I sat in my living room watching Netflix, I found out that my window has an excellent view of my new neighbors, who just so happen to like to shag with the blinds open. I guess I'll be buying some curtains. FML
Today, I was in a rush so when I got home I went to my bedroom, which is on the ground floor, and just started changing my clothes. It wasn’t until I was done I realised my blinds were open. Basically, I'd flashed my thong and tits to a packed bus stop. FML
Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. After assessing the loss, I saw a taunting note on the fridge saying, "Locks work best when the door's SHUT." My housekeeper had apparently left the door wide open. FML
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Top comments
Bmlacme 3
EWWW!! Why would you do that? That's just gross..
Lemun 1
LOL A little too confident ;)
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Comments (268)
krhds25 0
This FML is worthless without pics.
emptyego 0
I don't care what anybody says--only egotistical ****** pull that sort of nonsense. YDI for wanting the world to see you nude. YaDI for having a gigantic ego. Maybe next time you'll have a little bit of decency and class and shut your damn blinds.
texmas 0
YDI. I agree with 149. This could easily have been a married man, a gay man, or just a decent human being who didn't want to see your saggy, flabby ass at work. What kind of egotistical **** pulls a stunt like that? Just because so many people HAVE seen your junk doesn't mean that other people WANT to. Or even that THEY wanted to.
texmas 0
Ever wondered why they always close their eyes when they come?
Bleep_fml 0
Agree with #130. Don't assume every man wants to see your "goods". Real life doesn't work like in the (****) movies.
ArmoredSandwich 0
A, it's pretty weird to purposely leave the blinds open for the maintenance man, but as a man I can say it would probably make my day (assuming you're pretty). B, "Next time, close the blinds", could be just a polite gentleman's remark about you "forgetting" to close the blinds, so perhaps it wasn't what you think it was.
Kat_MS 0
Most likely, he was just looking out for you. Maybe he thought you forgot by accident and wanted to gently remind you. Or he could be gay. But that being said, its still a bit of a weird thing to do, stripping for strangers, lol.
MandM44 0
you're a creep. why would you want to show some random dude "the goods"? were you gonna sell him some?
CallMeSinbad 0
Exposing yourself like that, should get a sexual assault charge. That poor man did nothing to you. Also, to all saying shes not a ***** or a ****. Get real. Shes definitely a perverted *****. And I mean that in the least offensive way as possible.
shamille 5
he seems like a good guy. Go after him.