Today, I was dressing in my apartment when I noticed I left the blinds open. Outside, a maintenance man was mowing the grass within eyeshot. I figured I'd leave the blinds open and give him a little peek of the goods. Later I found a note on my window saying, 'Next time, close the blinds'. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I got home and noticed my kitchen light was on. I was annoyed because I'd definitely switched it off that morning. Then I noticed that I'd left the curtains open. The sun was shining directly through the window onto the wall. I'd spent five minutes investigating sunlight. FML
Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML
Today, I went to open my bedroom curtains while still in my pajamas, which, in my defense, were just a very oversized T-shirt. I didn’t realize the window cleaners were outside until I heard one of them say, “Morning!” We made prolonged eye contact before I slowly closed the curtains like I was lowering the lid on my own coffin. FML
Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML
Today, while masturbating at the computer, I was interrupted by a flash of light out of the corner of my eye. As I turned to face it, I realized I forgot to close the blinds. Standing at the window in the appartment across the street were two girls, one had a camera and was snapping a second shot. FML
Today, I left my apartment window open for some fresh air. When I returned, my idiot cat was on the balcony staring at me... from my neighbor’s apartment. FML
Today, I saw a woman in the neighbouring apartment taking a shower without pulling the blinds of her bathroom window. As a good Samaritan, I waved my arms to attract her attention that she forgot the blinds. She noticed me, opened the window, did a weird boob dance and middle fingered me. FML
Today, I moved into my new apartment. As I sat in my living room watching Netflix, I found out that my window has an excellent view of my new neighbors, who just so happen to like to shag with the blinds open. I guess I'll be buying some curtains. FML
Today, I was in a rush so when I got home I went to my bedroom, which is on the ground floor, and just started changing my clothes. It wasn’t until I was done I realised my blinds were open. Basically, I'd flashed my thong and tits to a packed bus stop. FML
Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. After assessing the loss, I saw a taunting note on the fridge saying, "Locks work best when the door's SHUT." My housekeeper had apparently left the door wide open. FML
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Top comments
Bmlacme 3
EWWW!! Why would you do that? That's just gross..
Lemun 1
LOL A little too confident ;)
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Comments (268)
Pounce 0
You know, having some sense of decency is okay.
Bunbu 8
Disgusting old *****. At least now you understand that you're ugly and sagging and wrinkled.
pike1790 0
#85 x1000. Your own fault. For shame.
mimimi_fml 0
1) YDI for stooping so low just to show off your body, or lack of. 2) not everyone in this world is cheap like you, showing off their body parts willingly to random strangers 3) if you really want to give people yours "goods" (should be "bads" actually in your case), you can always go downtown and flash hobos. im sure youd get some postivie reaction there 4) though im a women, i need to remind you that not all men are pigs and sexual humans, especially when whats in front of there eyes are not flattering. eg YOU
Nakedsquirrel 5
Guess OP has never heard any stories of creepy men that get off on voyeurism, or women that end up getting raped because of their carelessness. My sister found a guy sitting in a tree outside her window and jerking off, and she wasn't "letting him have a peek at her goods." You're lucky that guy wasn't a sexual predator.
Banthestrandland 0
@100 All human beings are sexual. This is why we admire holy men and women who take vows of chastity but mock people who can't get any. I'm surprised everyone's calling the OP a ***** just because she has an unrealistic idea of how good she looks. Voted YDI.
woahmanmeaghan 0
@ 100 you're more than one woman? I'm impressed. How'd you pull that one off?
Lexieo 0
I think if you're gonna flaunt it for everyone to see don't be upset that he criticized you..... you're ridiculous I wouldn't be surprised if you put out after knowing someone a few hours either
saxlover 0
umm, are you a woman or a guy, because that would change everything
mintfreshpinesol 0
woooow. you sound desperate