Today, I was cooking, and I took a pot of boiling water to the sink to drain. My pot holder slipped, and the boiling water spilled all over my breasts. Second degree boob burns are bad, but losing half a nipple to potato salad is worse. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was cooking. I leaned over the stove to preheat the oven, and burned my nipple on a pot of boiling water. I also have a teething son who is breastfeeding. FML
Today, while cooking, I managed to burn my finger. I quickly turned the tap on and ran my finger under cold water, but apparently someone had just used the hot tap, because boiling water flooded out onto my nicely scalded finger. FML
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
Today, I over-boiled some potatoes. I was having a bad day and this tipped me over the edge. I burst into tears and threw the potatoes all over my kitchen. I then stomped on the piping hot potatoes. The bottoms of my feet are blistered and still feel like they’re burning. FML
Today, I accepted I can't cook at all. Why? I burned myself cooking popcorn in a microwave oven. I accidentally burst the package open and a scorching kernel flew into my bra. FML
Today, I spilt a very hot cup of tea all over a burn I got yesterday from spilling a very hot cup of tea. FML
Today, I was making Cup Noodles for breakfast. After microwaving it for 3 minutes, I carefully grabbed the cup to pour some water out, but my hand gave out and some water spilled on it. Now I have a burned hand and no noodles. FML
Today, while grabbing a husk of corn out of the boiling hot pot, I splashed hot water on my neck, dropped the corn on my injured toe, and cut myself on the counters, all while my family laughed at my pain. FML
Today, I was cleaning a pan. I turned the water on, and it was super hot. My reaction was to slam my hand down. On a knife. So, not only do I have a burned hand, but there's also a huge cut on it from the knife. FML
Today, while cooking dinner, I managed to set my oven mitt on fire. In my panic, I tried to throw it in the sink, but it landed on a stack of t-shirts, which were lying on the counter. Both the mitt and my favorite Sonic Youth t-shirt now have matching burn holes. FML
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Top comments
ChrisLTC 3
Now when you flash your boobs it will look like they are winking!
FMLephant 2
One pound of potatoes, boiled and peeled, mayonnaise, celery, dill weed, a little mustard, and half a nipple. Season to taste.
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Comments (253)
jsen82 0
OMG
born_hustla 26
your boobs?! how high were you holding this pot?
DocBastard 38
Or OP is short. Or the water splashed as the pot dropped. Use whatever you call a brain before calling "fake", please.
Sirin_fml 46
That might be expecting too much, Doc.
MrFlintstone 5
no protect the boobs at all cost. their your money makers.
zach456 0
haha just haahaaa wait one more hahahaha
Scrubscrazy 0
OMG owwwwwwww!!
hendrik9300 0
That's bad,are you ok
Amanyyyyyy 29
...I'm gonna go with my gut here and say the answer to that is no...
Capt_Oblivious 10
Tomato pastie? No need for the adhesive back anymore, just melts right to the nipple. I see a marketable product here.
Capt_Oblivious 10
Potato pastie. damn iPhone thinking it knows what I'm thinking and trying to correct me
nohugs4u 8
iPhone always knows what were thinking
mikkelkarn 0
Lucky nurses xP
candygirldownsou 6
burns suck I feel ur pain
calebpva 0
how exactly was the nipple split in two?!
RedPillSucks 31
More likely, some of it was burned off. Calls for a prosthetic nipple.