By Anonymous - 08/12/2013 20:39 - United States

Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML
I agree, your life sucks 52 023
You deserved it 5 785

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Maybe your husband should keep his thoughts to himself. You never know who can hear you when you mutter. Even if you think no one can.

Wow, seems like he went balls deep on that one. No..? Okay.


Maybe your husband should keep his thoughts to himself. You never know who can hear you when you mutter. Even if you think no one can.

cheshirecat13242 32

Santa Clause hears you when you mutter..

Some guys have great hearing but most girls and I'd say all good mothers hear EVERYTHING!

miasaur 11

yes, women hear all and see all

Zimmington 21

I think he secretly wanted her to hear it.

incoherentrmblr 21

#85: So, women are the government now?...

Maybe the mother should learn to take a joke and stop being a bitch

Why the hell would he say that? >.

His mother-in-law stiffed him on some cookies. That's grounds for a fight. Honestly though, he sounds immature. The fact that he could be heard from a completely different room suggests that he wanted to be heard.

I don't know. I'm surprised he had the balls to say it, though.

I can't be the only one who laughed uncontrollably about this. Can I? Well then..

cuz hes a winner and a keeper, obviously

Bigfabthetruth52 22

Ur unwarranted to the comment was that shit was pretty funny.

Zimmington 21

What in the **** are you trying to say #73?!

He probably said it because he wants his balls gargled.

Karcasm 7

#69, you're not alone. Teehee, 69.

Wow your husband is a bit rude and childish.

BlueFlatts 20

Everyone has been a bit rude and/or childish like this at some point. Whether or not it gets posted on FML for everyone to judge is a different story.

Real men aren't that childish only little boys are.

He needs to learn to keep those comments to himself..

Zimmington 21

You're a bit shallow and pedantic.

AnOriginalName 19

But #76, how will he communicate his hopes and wishes if he doesn't speak up?

Wow, seems like he went balls deep on that one. No..? Okay.

1)Get family members at war with each other 2)Sell weapons to both sides 3) ?????? 4) Profit

Welcome to the United States of 'Murica.

"Got an AK-47 for his best friend Business the American way"

If both sides of your family are of the same ethnicity, I guess you could consider this as a civil war.

Ethnicity has nothing to do with civil wars.

That's true, my mistake. I guess I was thinking differently because of recent wars. For instance, the Syrian rebels vs. Syrian Gov and Libyan rebels vs. Libyan Gov.

Your husband is a ******* disrespectful twat people like that should go to hell

Zimmington 21

#6, you do know that in the Bible it says condemning people (saying they should/would/are going to hell) is a sin in itself right? So you'll be there right along with him... Have fun

#90 is right. Condemning people is a sin in itself. And I may as well point out that his picture goes along very nicely with his comment.

That was uncalled for. Your husband needs a stern talking to.

She didn't catch her son smoking pot, idiot.

Welshite is not an idiot, don't be rude.

I bet your mom approves of him now! After all these years! Who'd have known..

alshygirl 14

My mom would beat my husband's ass if he said that

cheshirecat13242 32

A dyslexic person once misspelled "wall". His friends thought it was funny so it stuck.

conman531 23

Lol is a word. OMG is too. They have been added to the English dictionary. Genius

I just had to look up lol now and it is in the dictionary, Merriam-Webster to be exact, as an abreviation. So still not a word. Same for OMG.

Omg-- Is that like "scuba" and "laser"? Lol

technically I think so. but the other abbreviations have enough vowels/vowels in the right places to actually constitute being a word. where trying to pronounce the three letters "omg" it just sounds kind of funny, and is commonly known to stand for something longer

Zimmington 21

#9, Your mom needs anger management & a sense of humour.

slickchrome 11
conman531 23

God I'm sorry that was not meant for this person! Now I feel bad

Rude? Maybe. It's definitely hilarious.