FML : Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips,...

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Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Anonymous - / Sunday 8 December 2013 20:39 / United States

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Top comments

By NessaMae | 19

#5784542 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:53

Maybe your husband should keep his thoughts to himself. You never know who can hear you when you mutter. Even if you think no one can.

By auro7 | 18

#5784546 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:54

Wow, seems like he went balls deep on that one.

No..? Okay.

Comments

By NessaMae | 19

#5784542 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:53

Maybe your husband should keep his thoughts to himself. You never know who can hear you when you mutter. Even if you think no one can.

cheshirecat13242 | 32

#5784613 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:18

Santa Clause hears you when you mutter..

JCRouzer29 | 27

#5784754 - Monday 9 December 2013 4:54

Some guys have great hearing but most girls and I'd say all good mothers hear EVERYTHING!

miasaur | 11

#5784793 - Monday 9 December 2013 5:35

yes, women hear all and see all

Zimmington | 21

#5784796 - Monday 9 December 2013 5:37

I think he secretly wanted her to hear it.

Sports_guy3 | 28

#5785068 - Monday 9 December 2013 8:55

Whose side are you on?

incoherentrmblr | 21

#5785192 - Monday 9 December 2013 12:34

#85: So, women are the government now?...

jlmontgomery | 11

#5785614 - Monday 9 December 2013 18:49

Yes....yes we are! LMAO

Blavock | 12

#5786081 - Tuesday 10 December 2013 0:18

Maybe the mother should learn to take a joke and stop being a bitch

By Kamon97 | 23

#5784543 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:54

Why the hell would he say that? >.

Welshite | 39

#5784582 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:01

His mother-in-law stiffed him on some cookies. That's grounds for a fight.

Honestly though, he sounds immature. The fact that he could be heard from a completely different room suggests that he wanted to be heard.

greeneyebeauty9 | 28

#5784635 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:30

I don't know. I'm surprised he had the balls to say it, though.

Odis12 | 11

#5784730 - Monday 9 December 2013 4:36

I can't be the only one who laughed uncontrollably about this. Can I? Well then..

gotaplanstan | 28

#5784744 - Monday 9 December 2013 4:41

cuz hes a winner and a keeper, obviously

Bigfabthetruth52 | 22

#5784753 - Monday 9 December 2013 4:49

Ur not.as unwarranted to the comment was that shit was pretty funny.

Zimmington | 21

#5784799 - Monday 9 December 2013 5:38

What in the fuck are you trying to say #73?!

Zebediabolical | 36

#5784811 - Monday 9 December 2013 5:49

He probably said it because he wants his balls gargled.

Karcasm | 7

#5785292 - Monday 9 December 2013 14:04

#69, you're not alone.

Teehee, 69.

Cavsfodawin | 21

#6642627 - Monday 4 July 2016 2:28

Because her mom is a bitch. Duh

By booboohoney | 12

#5784545 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:54

Wow your husband is a bit rude and childish.

WeiXinLun | 16

#5784647 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:37

So are all men

BlueFlatts | 20

#5784691 - Monday 9 December 2013 4:18

Everyone has been a bit rude and/or childish like this at some point. Whether or not it gets posted on FML for everyone to judge is a different story.

Genociiide | 15

#5784725 - Monday 9 December 2013 4:34

Real men aren't that childish only little boys are.

emily689 | 25

#5784764 - Monday 9 December 2013 4:58

He needs to learn to keep those comments to himself..

Zimmington | 21

#5784819 - Monday 9 December 2013 5:56

You're a bit shallow and pedantic.

AnOriginalName | 19

#5785098 - Monday 9 December 2013 9:25

But #76, how will he communicate his hopes and wishes if he doesn't speak up?

By auro7 | 18

#5784546 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:54

Wow, seems like he went balls deep on that one.

No..? Okay.

LittleSushi_fml | 13

#5784801 - Monday 9 December 2013 5:40

I'm talking 'bout balls deep!

By airforce987 | 20

#5784548 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:55

1)Get family members at war with each other
2)Sell weapons to both sides
3) ??????
4) Profit

karlcolt45 | 19

#5784604 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:13

UNDERPANTS

theaaxis | 27

#5784657 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:41

Welcome to the United States of 'Murica.

Enslaved | 36

#5784666 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:51

"Got an AK-47 for his best friend
Business the American way"

eddeeezzyy | 19

#5784792 - Monday 9 December 2013 5:35

If both sides of your family are of the same ethnicity, I guess you could consider this as a civil war.

ThatsMyPie | 20

#5785035 - Monday 9 December 2013 8:17

'MURICA

botanistjessica | 24

#5785131 - Monday 9 December 2013 10:45

Ethnicity has nothing to do with civil wars.

eddeeezzyy | 19

#5786286 - Tuesday 10 December 2013 2:40

That's true, my mistake. I guess I was thinking differently because of recent wars. For instance, the Syrian rebels vs. Syrian Gov and Libyan rebels vs. Libyan Gov.

By faihai44 | 1

#5784549 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:55

Your husband is a fucking disrespectful twat people like that should go to hell

NoFightinDestiny | 9

#5784719 - Monday 9 December 2013 4:32

Oh the irony.

NotAddictive | 6

#5784775 - Monday 9 December 2013 5:10

"disrespectul twat people" ha.

Zimmington | 21

#5784806 - Monday 9 December 2013 5:42

#6, you do know that in the Bible it says condemning people (saying they should/would/are going to hell) is a sin in itself right? So you'll be there right along with him...

Have fun

cjlerch | 29

#5835517 - Wednesday 22 January 2014 18:12

#90 is right. Condemning people is a sin in itself. And I may as well point out that his picture goes along very nicely with his comment.

By Welshite | 39

#5784550 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:55

That was uncalled for. Your husband needs a stern talking to.

raisinbam | 13

#5784826 - Monday 9 December 2013 6:03

She didn't catch her son smoking pot, idiot.

cyttex | 13

#5784929 - Monday 9 December 2013 6:48

Welshite is not an idiot, don't be rude.

By abhi95 | 31

#5784552 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:55

I bet your mom approves of him now! After all these years! Who'd have known..

By alshygirl | 14

#5784566 - Monday 9 December 2013 2:57

My mom would beat my husband's ass if he said that

sabriyyahwitter | 6

#5784601 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:12

Lol word

Welshite | 39

#5784606 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:14

Lol isn't a word. It's an acronym.

cheshirecat13242 | 32

#5784631 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:26

25--what about lawl?

Welshite | 39

#5784644 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:35

A dyslexic person once misspelled "wall". His friends thought it was funny so it stuck.

conman531 | 22

#5784665 - Monday 9 December 2013 3:49

Lol is a word. OMG is too. They have been added to the English dictionary. Genius

Dthsapprntc | 23

#5784672 - Monday 9 December 2013 4:01

I just had to look up lol now and it is in the dictionary, Merriam-Webster to be exact, as an abreviation. So still not a word. Same for OMG.

Enslaved | 36

#5784675 - Monday 9 December 2013 4:03

Omg-- Is that like "scuba" and "laser"? Lol

boating_guy | 33

#5784788 - Monday 9 December 2013 5:31

technically I think so. but the other abbreviations have enough vowels/vowels in the right places to actually constitute being a word. where trying to pronounce the three letters "omg" it just sounds kind of funny, and is commonly known to stand for something longer