Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was arrested for breaking into a house. This is what happens when I lose my key. FML
Today, I accidentally locked my car and house keys along with my phone in my car. Then I had to break into my own house looking for the spare. Someone called the police and I had to explain that I lived there. I forgot to grab the spare when I went to talk to the police officers I locked the door behind me. FML
Today, I got locked out of a building that I work in (I work night shifts). I locked my phone, wallet, and car keys in the building. I had no way of contacting my boss or getting a ride. I had to walk home at night, almost got hit by a car full of dudes yelling slurs, and had a woman scream at me from the passenger seat of a car. FML
Today, I had a job interview at a restauraunt opening up. One manager hypothetically asked me why I should be hired. I said I was more efficient than most. I left to find I'd locked my keys in the car. It took all the managers to help me get my keys out. FML
Today, someone had put a lock on my bike. While I was trying to saw it off, the police drove by. I was arrested for trying to steal a bike and released four hours later when they figured out that it was actually my bike. FML
Today, my neighbour called to say a crazy drunk man was breaking into my house. Thankfully, the police were already there, questioning me about “attempted unlawful entry” into my own house. My keys had been taken from a friend so I wouldn’t drive. It's 1°C and I still haven’t gotten inside. FML
Today, I hit a parked car and fled because I was so scared. Four hours later, the cops showed up at my house so I broke down crying confessing everything. Turns out, they weren't there about the car I hit. They were alerting me about the string of burglaries in my neighborhood recently. FML
Today, I spent forty minutes trying to break into my own house after being locked out. After finally getting in through a small unlocked window, I discovered my keys in my pants pocket. FML
Today, I saw my car being broken into on the street below my apartment. Too scared to stop them myself, I called the police. Before I could even tell them what was going on, they put me on hold. It was a good 5 minutes before I realized they'd hung up on me. FML
Today, I accidentally set off an alarm at the school I work for. No one was there, I didn't have the code or password the company needed, my boss wouldn't answer his phone, three policemen interrogated me and asked for ID, but realized I left home without my wallet. There was nothing I could do. I cried. FML
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Top comments
MubeenMV3 5
Ohh sht, the first sentence of this FML is so misleading lmao
babybebop2 4
Ha I started reading like "you deserved it" then Im like oh no that sucks
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Comments (151)
xStaciexLynnx 15
Even people who are breaking into your house illegally can pick the lock. They don't have to break in through the window. Also, nobody said he had a van that says lock smith on the side. If it was off hours he could have just driven his normal vehicle out. Or maybe he doesn't have a vehicle with anything written on the side- nobody made a rule that we have to write our occupation on the side of our vehicles.
SF49ERS 0
****** asswipe. Why so misleading? lol
TomHarrow 5
Thumbed down for your name.
kaykay20 0
Wouldn't the owner be standing next to you when your unlocking the door?
sugaryspice 5
This is one of the best FMLs I have ever read! At least you have a good story to tell after this experience.
bubo_fml 11
A real locksmith would've charged the homeowner for additional labor hours for being detained by the po-po!
DomoLaDii 8
I was gonna say u deserved it but then I read the rest lol Damn the first sentence jajajas!
zombicidal 11
my car says "student" on the side
Haha_no_123 11
While I was reading "i was breaking into a house" I thought, oh well obviously this person deserved it but when I read you were a locksmith I thought "hahaha you got me there! I feel bad for you then" I never pressed You Deserve It though
OfficeNinja 5
Sounds like a case, a rare case, of everybody doing their job!
ashesofempires04 7
You deserve it for looking shady enough for the neighbors to call the police. You deserve it for not promptly presenting your credentials to the police when they arrived. You deserve it for not making your profession obvious enough to onlookers.
THE_A_TEEN 28
You're an idiot for clicking YDI in factors that weren't even mention in the FML. Idiotic twat...