Intimacy: Today, I was about to make love to my girlfriend at the local...

By Khrixas_069 - 18/06/2011 07:10 - United States

Today, I was about to make love to my girlfriend at the local park when a cop caught us. I had to give him our information and hold a conversation with "Fire and Ice" lubricant on my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 722

You deserved it 58 648

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Same thing different taste

Kinda sus

By kmf - 10/08/2009 19:06 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get hot and heavy in my truck at our favorite park. We started going at it and we were both butt naked when I saw a car pull into the lot. Not only was it a cop car, but the first thing the cop asked my girlfriend was, "Are you being held against your will?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 138

You deserved it 14 356

By loveade11 - 12/01/2010 19:28 - France

Today, a police officer caught my girlfriend and me having sex. The officer was my dad, and we were butt naked in his new Ford Expedition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 714

You deserved it 35 566

Caught red-handed

By Anonymous - 30/11/2020 20:04

Today, my girlfriend and I got busted by the cops having sex in a dark parking lot near the beach. As if that wasn't bad enough, as I was trying to talk my way out of a ticket, one of the cops peeks into the car window and I hear my girlfriend awkwardly giggle and say, "Hi daddy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 748

You deserved it 710

Straight to jail

By Miss bad decisions - 03/11/2023 22:00

Today, my boyfriend and I got busted having public sex. In desperation, I promised the officer he could fuck me if he let us go. Now I've got an extra charge and probably an ex-boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 827

By T-Guy - 03/07/2011 03:01 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted to spice up our sex life, so we went and had sex in the park. We had 30 minutes of "spice", just to spend seven hours in jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 291

You deserved it 50 948

Hello hello hello

By Bonnie and Clyde - 08/05/2015 02:18 - United States - Humble

Today, my boyfriend and I got busted by a cop for having sex in his car. When the cop sent us on our way, we went home and the garage was open, so we called the cops thinking someone was in the home. No one was in the house, and we got the same cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 080

You deserved it 9 338

By suzanneallen - 11/09/2009 04:23 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 127

You deserved it 40 939

Hands on the wheel

By Username - 05/10/2011 00:02 - United States

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 962

You deserved it 12 660

By skinny dipper - 21/10/2011 02:48 - United States

Today, I was caught skinny dipping by the police. With the arresting officer's daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 034

You deserved it 12 745

Sticky fingers

By FlickedOff 2023 - 01/12/2023 06:00

Today, my FWB and I were on a road trip. His dumbass got us pulled over by the cops, and he decided it was the perfect moment to start fingering me. Worse yet, I got off in between visits from the cop. He took his license and ticket with his fingering hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 134

You deserved it 469

Iamnotmyself 17

Saturday 18 June 2011 16:14

Looks like this conversation wasn't too "hot" or too "cool"

Luciens19 0

Saturday 18 June 2011 16:15

Feel the burn!!! ha

Comments

EvanAGD 7

Sunday 19 June 2011 9:57

Was it hot or was it cold when you were talking to the cop? Haha

Mistery510 6

Sunday 19 June 2011 10:00

who makes "love" in a park??!!?

Oortiz423 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 10:11

**** the police, not only do they arrest ppl for dumb shit, they **** block!!

ariestiger15 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 14:59

idiot that's wat u get for trying to do it in a local park

hoopla12345 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 15:18

serves you right, you nasty kid

Thrasher91 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 16:30

Wanna ****? Go home or get a room. serves you right

swatman360 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 18:00

if your gonna get it in don't do it in public, dumbass!

the_bass_man007 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 21:25

those condoms are awesome btw. but FYL for not scoring the place out before you get it on with your gf.

johnny_carmello 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 21:41

fyl? shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit, your gf is up for fairly kinky sex!! Quality story as well sure

mooimafishabbey 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 22:46

why the **** would u have sex at a local park! serves u right!

Keywords

Weird Miscellaneous My ex Awkward Shopping Racism Family Relatable Kids AITA Love Cheating Work Break-ups Animals Cats Cute Intimacy Sex Relationship advice Alcohol Coworkers Mental health Health Psychology Cops Neighbours Scary Stressed out Parents

The Top

Today, my now ex-friend told me she had feelings for my ex and was also choosing him over our friendship, despite being fully aware of the crazy rollercoaster our relationship was and being there to hear every detail of the trauma. She classily told me at random, in a public mall. People suck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 432

You deserved it 236

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 201

You deserved it 7 094

The Top

Today, I got home from working overnight and let the 2 dogs out of their crates. The oldest one (almost 9 years-old) was acting weird. He was shaking and couldn't stand up, let alone sit. I thought something was incredibly wrong. Nope, he just had gotten hold of 10 of my "treats" when my SO wasn't looking. Dude was high all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 550

Today, I walked into pawn shop and found a nice laptop which I inspected after I thought I lost mine months ago. Turns out my ex pawned it after having it at her place all this time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 311

You deserved it 1 247

Today, I spent 900 dollars on a ticket for my boyfriend to visit me and he missed the flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 274

You deserved it 561

Today, my group of friends officially cut ties with me. According to them, my girlfriend "has me whipped" and made me "boring", all because she helped me break free from my alcoholism and finally get sober (two years and eight months running). They told me to call them when I'm "ready to be fun again". FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 887

You deserved it 175

Today, I got a phone call, and the person on the other line started speaking French. I assumed it was my friend since we usually speak French with each other, so I said in French "What do you want, asshole?". It wasn't my friend. It was a representative for the exchange program I'm applying for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 016

You deserved it 97 469

Today, I introduced my kind and amazing Iranian boyfriend to my mother. When he went to use the rest room, she warned me to "knock it off with this Bin Laden fetish" or she'll have me put on psychiatric hold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 898

You deserved it 3 141