By neednewdeoderant - 14/12/2011 02:39 - United States

Today, I walked into my bathroom to find my girlfriend applying my deodorant. This would have been fine, if she wasn't applying it to her mouth. I don't think deodorant helps with bad breath, but a quick Google search shows that it does help with herpes. FML
I agree, your life sucks 47 614
You deserved it 3 548

Same thing different taste

Top comments

When I first read this, I saw "If she wasn't applying it to"... Is it wrong if I thought crotch first?

gunmania0 12

There are two ways you can get herpes... just don't let her give you a Blowie...


gunmania0 12

There are two ways you can get herpes... just don't let her give you a Blowie...

I think he should maybe ask where she got it before he goes and dumps her. Maybe she got it from a previous boyfriend who didn't tell her? Probably should use her own deodorant though...

jwade11 12

I wouldn't let her get her mouth anywhere near your stuff!! And maybe possibly go get tested yourself!?..

How does deodorant help with herpes? WTF?

Mouth herpes is Spread through open soars on the mouth, it won't spread unless she has an outbreak and in fact more ppl have mouth herpes than u think it's very common.(it can be a cold soar, and may only occur 1-3 times a year) My older brother suffers from it and we just noted not to share joints when he had an outbreak.

Wrong. You can get it when an infected person isn't having an outbreak... It is just less likely Your brother has probably already given you herpes. That will be a fun story to tell your significant other.

Technically speaking there are three ways

#42 is a great example of why you should pay attention to your education children.

Just hope she gets an allergic reaction to it

People who jump on their hippopotamuses right away and keep shouting "dump that *****, etc." should get informed first. My specialty may be fruits, but having had mouth herpes several time and being around retards quite often, I know it's curable, not very dangerous, and exposes uneducated fools. Cantaloup.

Anyone realize she may have been just been using it as chapstick?

kapeazodia 0
Llamacod 11

Uhh fruitdealer, herpes is not, let me repeat, NOT curable. It is treatable, as in you can use anti-virals to cut down the time of a viral outbreak by 1 to 4 days but it isn't curable. Once you have it you will always have it.

Um no I don't have herpes I've been tested, I don't get cold soars at all or any sort of pimples around my mouth, in fact the person who told me that it was ok was the doctor who diagnosed my brother,

Also when u say it's less likely but still possible to retract the disease when no outbreak occurs is only bc for the first day of an outbreak u don't show any symptoms the next day however u can have a full blown attack. Ppl think it's from not having an outbreak but it's like a ninja at first.

TheDeadlyTurtle - For ****'s sake, it's spelled "SORES". SORES! See that? SORES! And it can be transmitted during an outbreak or when a carrier is asymptomatic (ie between outbreaks). It has nothing to do with the day of the outbreak or anything of the sort. For someone who has no clue about immunology, you certainly are quite confident in your cluelessness.

Rachel, you do realize that cold sores are herpes-1 right? Most of Americans have it, and they can appear anywhere on the body. I'm pretty sure thats what he was referring to

You can't "get tested" for herpes, though. The only 'test' for herpes is a visual inspection.

Visual inspection is usually required, yes, but (for women especially) any doctor will require a culture swab to confirm the presence of the herpes simplex virus.

Nope I'm talking about flying, w.e spelling mistake my whole life is ruined Yes I stand by my logic I don't care if it's wrong as long as I believe in it then im fine.

And nobody even if wonders if maybe, just maybe, OP's girlfriend likes the smell of the deo and thought it might taste good? Don't conside herpes before dumb/weird girlfriend.

And nobody even if wonders if maybe, just maybe, OP's girlfriend likes the smell of the deo and thought it might taste good? Don't conside herpes before dumb/weird girlfriend.

i_amthe_walrus 0

It is entirely possible she just wanted to eat/smell it. I know a girl whom is in love with the smell of sweaty dirty feet. I am not kidding, the nastier the better. It's freaking weird but towach their own. I like the smell of puppy paws which might seem weird to people.

tweetbaby14 18

134, bullshit "most Americans have it"... No one, I repeat, NO ONE in my family has it, and I know even more people that I'm around quite a bit that don't. Please stop trying to make all Americans seem like ******/diseased people, thanks.

soldiersgirl0212 3

Actually cold sores are quite common, and anybody can get it cause we all have it, only some people get them and some don't ,

Smartest thing I've read all day. GTFO all you "Oooh ppl with cold sores have feelings too" dumbos, a clean, undiseased lip is sexy.

tweetbaby14 18

Pendatik, just because everyone else worships you that doesn't mean you can go around trying to tell people how to respond to things. In my eyes if a person has herpes they are a ***** that's what I think I am entitled to having an opinion as long as I don't force others into thinking I'm right. You are not the god of FML just someone that is on here much too often and every pathetic kiss up thinks is a god. Just thought I should bring you back down to earth.

TheDeadlyTurtle - Ummm... What? Are you saying that since you believe that you can't get herpes when your brother is asymptomatic, you won't? Someone explain to me how that works because it's time for me to believe my girlfriend can't get pregnant.

xSonic 9

What causes one to do such a thing?

Herpes isn't nearly as bad as people seem to think, and it's very treatable. Friend of mine has it. I mean it's obviously not good but still

The (admittedly stupid) reasoning behind her behavior is pretty clear, 18. She thought it'd give her better breath.

I hope your being sarcastic cause if you think the FML is about bad breathe you obviously didn't read it

Well, he's assuming he knows why she did it based on a google search. Lame. He'd find out of she got cold sores faster by looking at her mouth...

Sure..... a "friend of yours' XD If it's not that bad then why are you embarassed to admit that it's you?

Why would he assume that's the problem? What if she's just retarded?

KailyKii 11

Well you learn something new everyday.

When I first read this, I saw "If she wasn't applying it to"... Is it wrong if I thought crotch first?

Deodorant for the snatch came to mind as well. Sucks for you OP, a case of a smelly fish would be much better than dealing with a rotten one.

dy1987 7

I was thinking the same thing too. But actually applying deodorant after shaving the bikini zone, or snatch as someone else called it, is a way to prevent razor bumps and/or razor burn at least that is what people claim.

I think you have to use certain types of deodorant for that. Such as aloe based types.

Deoderant on the crotch prevents in-grown hairs from growing apparently xD

I though the same damn thing. I guess great perverted minds can think alike to!

lexx769 0

Get her some herpes medication for christmas and she can buy you some condoms!

You can still catch herpes while wearing a condom.

Torva_fml 16

But the chances are far less than without a condom.

Haha I like this guys name " neednewdeodrant"

uprising_fml 0


Good thing you caught that or you'd have armpit herpes and ended up like the guy a few FMLs back. Nothing attracts the ladies like bloody armpits.

builditbetter09 3

U smell a break up... And some deodorant.

I think hiding an STI is a perfectly good reason to break up with someone, and if she didn't have it when they got together all the more reason to.

I don't get why the majority here think break ups are the best/only solution to every relationship issue. I once got a cold sore after sharing a drink with a friend, is that cheating now?

builditbetter09 3

Are you ******* retarded!?!^^^ and thank you 140 at least someone in this place isn't a dumb ass.

omggtfomi 1

140 the type of herpes she has in NOT an STI. She could have gotten it from sharing chap stick with her mom. She has HHV1, which can also cause genital herpes. HHV2, a completely different virus than HHV1, causes genital herpes, THAT'S the one you're referring to. 140 and 173 are completely ignorant