Animals: Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat,...

By Anonymous - 18/08/2011 13:38 - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 747

You deserved it 3 447

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Same thing different taste

By awesome - 21/09/2010 04:49 - United States

Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 324

You deserved it 81 351

By DM - 04/03/2013 20:02 - United States - Fayville

Today, I walked into what I thought would be a surprise birthday party. It wasn't. It was my parents staging an intervention over my cat obsession. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 927

You deserved it 30 029

Tactful

By petlover - 23/11/2009 04:30 - United States

Today, I had to put my 17 year-old cat down. I cried the whole way up to the vet's office and back. After finally coming to terms with the situation, and trying to forget, my dad's friend walks up to me and says, "So, I heard you killed your cat?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 218

You deserved it 3 855

By Anonymous - 30/09/2013 16:23 - United States - Mulino

Today, while I was pet-sitting for my boyfriend's parents, one of their dogs killed one of their kittens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 544

You deserved it 5 492

Great start to the day

By Anonymous - 04/04/2021 20:00

Today, I went into my parents' room after spending pretty much all weekend in my their bed while they were out of town. I happened to look out the window, and on the windowsill was a puddle of cat vomit with a condom in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 273

You deserved it 756

Welcome to the family!

By Sprtsgeek13 - 13/09/2012 12:37 - United States - Camden

Today, I had my girlfriend over to meet my parents. After dinner, we were in the living room talking. My dad thought it would be funny to grab our cat, stick it down his shirt, then pretend to give birth to it, with sound effects. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 432

You deserved it 2 531

By jsmills92 - 21/12/2012 00:26 - United States - Cranston

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 417

You deserved it 4 443

By whymomwhy - 11/07/2015 17:20 - United States - Salem

Today, my mother talked shit about me to the cat while I was in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 343

You deserved it 2 880

How could you?

By Anonymous - 15/02/2023 07:00 - Estonia

Today, despite me not liking cats, which my wife knew, she got a cat anyway. Her cat went for a walk outside and was hit by a car. I rushed outside to help the cat but found she was already dead, and the culprit had driven away. When my wife found out that her cat was dead, she thought I'd killed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 192

You deserved it 139

By Username - 01/05/2014 10:33 - United States

Today, my dog died. My parents told me to bury it out back. In the process, I managed to dig up my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 437

You deserved it 4 588

jose1760 1

Thursday 18 August 2011 18:46

I'm calling PETA!!

flockz 19

Thursday 18 August 2011 18:46

"but the cat likes it in the oven..." too cruel?

Comments

cooxoxo 9

Saturday 20 August 2011 8:05

Awww :(

furlifefoo 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 10:32

Kill your ******* parents. Bludgeon them with an axe.

miimehfoo 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 12:30

Aww poor kitty:/

C_Mueck13 0

Saturday 20 August 2011 19:07

hahah funny

JustJaredfied 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:34

Your parents aren't to bright are they?

THE_A_TEEN 27

Monday 22 August 2011 0:39

You do know that's the first sign of being a serial killer right, dont trust your parents my advice: grab fluffy and RUN!!!!!

zembof 3

Sunday 21 August 2011 13:14

I like ur parents only they wouldn't want to take the pride and glory of actually killing it

xHarleyQuinnx 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 13:32

Omg :(

TeenageDirtbagg 3

Monday 22 August 2011 3:52

Lmfaoo !! I hate cats

jcester 0

Monday 22 August 2011 9:24

HAHA !!!

jeepy_fml 4

Tuesday 23 August 2011 16:02

hahax run away from home!! they might be discussing how to kill you next and put blame on accident

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 031

You deserved it 2 909

Today, in the middle of an argument, my husband picked me up and sat me on our breakfast bar. I’m terrified of heights so getting down took me over 5 minutes because of how bad I was shaking. He left to meet his friends, who “don’t start arguments just because they’re bored.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 278

You deserved it 786

The Top

Today, I woke up in the hospital with a mild concussion, a sprained neck, and a broken shoulder. How did this happen? Earlier, I ran into the guy I used to bully all throughout school. Once his wife realized who I was, she piledrived me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 223

You deserved it 3 119

Today, I went to a party 40 minutes away by bus with some friends. We missed the bus, waited half an hour for the second, and arrived just in time to hear the policemen say, "Party's over. Get outta here." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 183

You deserved it 8 076

Today, I hit a car while trying to park. Assuming that no one saw, I moved my car and parked somewhere else. Hours later I get a call from the university police. While backing up to go to the police station I hit another car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 746

You deserved it 55 989

Today, I went to a dance and saw a really cute guy. Glow sticks were everywhere, so trying to be cute, I took a broken one and dripped some of the glowing liquid on my chest. It made him notice me, but only for him to point out that I'd managed to cut myself and was bleeding badly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 934

You deserved it 51 994

Today, for the first time in months, I wore my naturally curly hair instead of straightening it. Later on at work, a customer pointed at my hair and said, "Look, Bellatrix fucked a poodle." All my coworkers laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 749

You deserved it 142

Today, I went into my part-time job at a drugstore. We always have one item we try and sell to every customer. For the next week I have to ask every person if they would like to try my nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 831

You deserved it 4 549