Health: Today, I'm so sick, I'm even sick in my dreams. Orientation for...

By Anonymous - 04/07/2019 08:00 - United States - Gainesville

Today, I'm so sick, I'm even sick in my dreams. Orientation for my new job starts tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 481

You deserved it 116

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Same thing different taste

By do you want a bag - 24/09/2016 04:48 - Canada - Surrey

Today, after 3 weeks of my new job, I'm already having work-related dreams. I'm having troubles differentiating between the 8 hour shifts in real life and the 8 hour shifts in my dream. I'm doubly exhausted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 133

You deserved it 1 051

Leave me alone

By Anonymous - 19/11/2021 10:59

Today, I was taking phone calls. In my dreams. That's just how horrible my job is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 88

By helpme - 23/11/2015 17:00 - United States - Annapolis

Today, I started dreaming about being at work. I already work more hours a week than I requested, and I live right across from my work and can see it out my window. I can never leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 397

You deserved it 2 101

I'm totally wired, can't you see?

By Anonymous - 03/11/2021 20:00

Today, because of my new job, I'm so tired I can’t think straight anymore. Long hours to make a sterling first impression? Nope. I haven’t even started working yet, I’m just exhausted because it all stresses me to the point I can’t sleep at night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 790

You deserved it 255

The planets aligned

By Anonymous - 15/08/2022 18:00 - United States

Today, I started a new job. I also started my period, and have the shits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 927

You deserved it 112

Not a morning person

By Anonymous - 30/01/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I was forced to come in to work early in the morning. For me, that means I will have a pounding migraine, vomiting, and diarrhea for at least the next two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 244

Lava

By not_fakingit - 22/09/2013 04:26 - Canada - Montr?al

Today, I joked with my boss about calling in sick to work tomorrow with food poisoning to avoid taking the Sunday shift. Tonight, I'm sitting on the toilet bowl in agonizing pain with combination diarrhea and vomiting. My shift starts in 3 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 558

You deserved it 11 246

By sleepy - 03/01/2011 02:58 - Norway

Today, after a two week holiday, I'm returning to work exhausted. I had nightmares about work every single night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 685

You deserved it 3 798

Heaven knows I'm miserable now

By lazydude - 17/03/2021 11:01

Today, I got hired and now I have to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 1 585

Knackered

By kira - 19/07/2023 02:00 - United States - Denver

Today, I have to go work for ten hours in a warehouse after getting no sleep at all. I get horrendously sick if I don’t sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 598

You deserved it 197

Kyle Reagan 11

Friday 5 July 2019 19:29

Better the orientation than the interview

Comments

Kyle Reagan 11

Friday 5 July 2019 19:29

Better the orientation than the interview

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The Top

Today, my fiancée's ex sent me screenshots of their conversation. In it, he told her how badly he’d wanted to marry her, what a great life he'd have given her, and what a huge mistake she'd made by letting him get away. My ring, our house even our pets should’ve been hers. Gee, thanks for settling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 166

You deserved it 133

Today, after taking my girlfriend on a date, she invited me back to her place for "hot coffee and dessert." Excitedly, I said yes. When we got there, we actually had coffee and dessert. When I told her this wasn't what I'd had in mind, she kicked me out for being a pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 153

You deserved it 68 066

The Top

Today, after drinking a half gallon of liquid laxative in preparation for a colonoscopy, I puked the half gallon of laxative. Out my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 220

You deserved it 224

Today, good news! The guitar I have been saving up for, for 5 months, finally arrived. It came inside a beautiful black and white case, and impossible to get into without the key. They didn't pack the key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 271

You deserved it 2 915

Today, what started as a family gathering turned into an all-out brawl. I saw my son’s wife punch him, so I hit her. Her mom and sister jumped me. My husband was pulling them off when the other husband thought he was attacking them and jumped in, so my son jumped in as well. We won, at least. FML

I agree, your life sucks 613

You deserved it 1 121

Today, my girlfriend brought home her fourteenth effing Stanley Cup thermos cup contraption thing. They are taking over our tiny apartment. I can't deal with this madness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 91

Today, after months of living on five dollars a day for food in college, I found out my parents bought me an expensive meal plan and forgot to mention it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 521

You deserved it 1 497

Today, I went to visit my parents after 4 years of not seeing them. They'd moved without telling me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 784

You deserved it 19 599