Today, I told my husband that I was going to get a swimsuit from the Victoria's Secret catalog. He replied, "Are you going to get the body to go with it?" FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my boyfriend and I were in Victoria's Secret. I saw a picture of a model and said, "I wish I looked like that." He replied with, "Me too." FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret. He then added that his mother picked it out. FML
Today, my boyfriend bought a bikini he wanted me to wear in our hot tub. Unfortunately, I ran out of swimsuits for my daily swim at the public pool, so I took the new bikini. Now I know why he wanted to be alone when I wore it, as water turns it see-through and melts the stitching so it falls off. FML
Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML
Today, my daughter asked me to take her to Victoria's Secret so I could buy her some "sexy clothes". She's 9. FML
Today, I caught my husband trying on the sexy bra I bought to wear just for him. For shits and giggles, I made him try on my dress too. He looked better in it than I do. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were looking up sexy clothes for me to wear while role-playing. I saw something I liked and asked him if we should get it. When he saw the model wearing it in the picture, he asked "Does it come with the girl?" FML
Today, I left the house for a while and when I came back my husband was wearing my lacy lingerie. He looks better in it than I do. FML
Today, my girlfriend texted me a screenshot of a bathing suit on a store’s website and asked for my opinion. I told her it wouldn’t look good. She then texted me a screenshot of me liking a picture of a friend on Facebook, wearing that same bathing suit, saying, “But on her it looks fine, right?” Fuck. FML
Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML
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Top comments
theonlysweetpea 10
Tell him that once he starts lookin like a pro athlete, you'll get that figure but until then go change a lightbulb!
ZombieeeeUnicorn 1
what a douche.
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Comments (243)
ElricMustang 23
Lol that was messed up, but it was pretty funny
DarthVader77 9
So, he is insensetive jerk, douchebag and an asshole. He has no right to be honest about his wishes because everyone knows that the only path to family happiness is through the art of lying. Logical to the extreme. He is probably all the things I called him but he is also someone who calls shovel a shovel. Unfortunately, as time goes on, there are less and less people capable of being straightforward. Yes, you can call them jerks and assholes but at the very least, they are not full of it, unlike so many others.
mkcherry 14
This is absolutely something my s/o would say because he pokes fun of me and he adores my body, unless he was flat out being an ass, he probably didnt mean it. If you're ordering from a VS catalog you cant be horrendously overweight (they don't carry plus size suits) so maybe you should lighten up?
jmaxmarsh 9
Such an ass
LyricaSilvan 30
Wow. That's just rude.
Countryboy1996 18
You married someone who had the nerve to say that? Hit me up if you want a man who knows how to treat a lady.
fantasyworld 39
He's an ass.
Asimk 12
He's very mean what a jerk .... But r u going to get that body to with it ??