hospital
United States
Today, I started my first day at a new hospital. My first assignment? Shave an elderly man's testicles. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
dr mamour
Paris, France
Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML
not as scarred as he should be
Cambridge, Canada
Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML
jonh_215
United States
Today, as a going away present after five years of military service and one combat tour, the hospital scheduled me for a prostate exam. FML
WTFFAIL
Montreal, Canada
Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML
Anonymous
Utrecht, Netherlands
Today, it was my first day working as a dental assistant, leaving me in charge of all cleaning. The first patient was so scared, he peed his pants. Which might have been understandable if he hadn't been a fully grown man. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
Detroit, United States
The first day of the rest of your life (or not)
Today, it was my first day at my new job at a nursing home. Not only were we short staffed, two residents passed away, and I got beaten up by an old man. FML
Matthew
Wrong place, wrong time
Today, I awoke with a swollen, painful testicle. I called the ambulance and went to the hospital. After they'd done an ultrasound, it's a bad infection. My nurse was someone I used to know and had a major crush on. She's responsible for checking my testicle every 20 minutes when she checks my heart rate. FML
HairyBoobs
United States
So, here's the thing…
Today, I nearly sliced my nipple off while shaving my chest and had to go to the ER. Turns out it was a teaching hospital so I got to explain in front of two doctors and eight med students how, even though I'm a woman, my nipples are so hairy I have to shave them. FML
Buggga
Australia
Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML
OhPleaseNo
OhPleaseNo
We could be heroes
Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML
Top comments
knibbsy 4
Man, you're new job is nuts! What a hairy situation. You did some hangin' around the office, only to get low-balled by your boss.
xxxbooxxx 16
Eww!!
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Comments (99)
OceanMinded 0
bullshit...
VenomSiphon 13
Nurse Techs ftl
elmorous 0
haha. just wait til you get to sponge bath someone after they fall and break their hip. they tend to lose control of bodily functions then. you should research a job before applying
underpaid011 0
hey, old man needs his nards shaved. the real FML here should be the old man! you know why hospitals shave people. it's not for swimsuit season! they are going to slice open that guys sack, and maybe do to him what I had done to two cats! and all you can worry about is you shaved em?
perdix 31
The good news is that if you **** up, he's probably done trying to have kids anyways ;), so no real harm done. Let me know if you get good at it, I might want to hire you to do some moonlighting. I already outsource the chore of mowing my literal lawn to service that does it better than me, so I might try doing the same with my intimate lawn ;)
Juneyah1017 9
this will be a good "test" for you. hope u have balls of fun.
aback 5
Could be worse. You could be getting paid to put labels on library books in Texas.
bbyiitsCANDY 0
that's NASTYYY!!!
20waffleater10 0
while your fondoling his nuts you should say ooops!
skreech96 0
that's hot hahaha